Real women have curves! Now that Kirstie is skinny again she is not a REAL woman! Now that she is skinny Kelly Osbourne is no longer a real woman! Marie Osmond is no longer a real woman! John Goodman is no longer a real woman! Al Roker is no longer a real woman! Jennifer Hudson is no longer a real woman! Kathy Ireland is no longer a real woman! REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES! |
This is the next phase in political fat acceptance. The days of justifying our fatness by lying and saying we have a mysterious genetic or metabolic disorder are over. We now freely admit to and embrace what the fat haters would call gluttony. We fatlings are no longer apologists for our size nor our greedy gluttony. We are fat because we eat huge amounts of food and we like it. If you don't like it get used to it because fat people are now the overwhelming majority.
I have a question for FatBastard :)
ReplyDeleteHow tall are you and how much do you weigh?
Keep up your really good work and legitimate blog
Anon,
ReplyDeleteMy height and weight are trade secrets.
I am glad you found Bigger Fatter Blog and the new and honest fat acceptance.
With the help of experts like Dr Gerald "Teddy" Bear, Coach Gaines, The Chef who is a culinary nutritionist and Rev BLA my weight fluctuates. I diet when I get too fat for my constitution. That figure is also classified. I like to diet down about 100 pound and then go on a feeding frenzy.
In many cases I agree but in my case as you know I Fat Bastard am an apple shaped grizzly bear. Sure, a lot of NAAFA girls get pig bristles like mine and even us apple bears have moobs bigger than most women but we still maintain a lot of our masculinity but I must say the majority of fat men do turn into Nancy boys like you.
ReplyDeleteIn many ways us fatlings are unisex. Once we get to above a 30 BMI we all begin to morph which is a good thing.
Real women have curves! Fat is curves! Real women are FAT!
ReplyDeleteI agree that fat men are more like women than real men. A real man is supposed to be strong and maybe even if he has a gut he is still able to lift a lot of weights and protect his woman with muscles and his high income level.
Women who are fat who become skinny are secretly homosexuals because they want to become skinny men, not viluptious women for men to enjoy. You should just embrace the fat that you have and not try to change it, just focus on things like hobbies and raising your kids rather than wasting your time on painful diets and exercises which will just give you injuries. Also exercise makes you die younger because it will give you a heart attack, which usually happens to marathonners but us fat people live longer because we are more robust and can survive even without our hearts beating for longer than thin people can since we have more extra blood and nutrients for emergencies while skinny people die very fast when their heart stops since they have no nutrients to help them. Also a fat person is smarter, because women are smarter than men and women are fatter than men, and I am smarter than all of my babies daddies because I make more then they do with child support and yet I do not have to work at all, so who is smarter now?
Finally we need to stop the magazines who just tell the homosexual youth that thin women are the most attractive and they are like sheep and just believe the government lies done to prop up the weight loss industry and taking away jobs from food manufactuers in America and instead giving the jobs to factories in Indochina making pills and Bowlflexes to exercise on and injure everyone pulling muscles to give more jobs for the rich doctors to bankrupt medicare and social security so that soon all of the money will be in the hands of the rich and the only way for women to survive will be to have kids with multiple partners and survive off of child support and government assistance like I do, since getting a husband with a six figure income like I deserve is next to impossible because the magazines tell them that I am not beautiful. Now do you understand what is going on in our society?
I think you have really hit upon something Bigger Fatter Woman and I think I see the fat feminist thing more clearly.
ReplyDeleteFat girls get so fat that their skinny husband can't carry them over the threshold both figuratively and literally. So there is more gender equality. The fat man then becomes on a par with the skinny woman who secretly want to because an ultra fem male homosexual ie weak and helpless. Having an attractiveness for the female form becasue they are really lesbians seeing as how they are not real womyn they find fat sissy boys aka non liberated women as the women they want to dominate.
The best fat gender and fat sexuality theorist I know is Teddy Bear who is a pear shaped Nancy boy. He really needs to weight in on this.
Fat womyn need skinny guys to pork them and the brothas have the large enough wedding tackle to give the fat womyn the new alpha woman what she needs. You are a splendid example of that Bigger Fatter Women with your macho femininity.
Excellent post!
Hey Bigger Fatter Woman,
ReplyDeleteI guess I am a real woman!! Because I got curves, so many curves you don't know what to do with them all. OINK OINK!
I think it is good for people of different body types to be together, as this is part of diversity. Skinny women should bang fat dudes like Fat Bastard and myself. Fat chicks should get railed by entire frat houses in filthy gangbangs (if the fat girls want. Because you know the frat guys would. "No muff too tuff, no tail too frail"). The physics of fat dudes and fat chicks banging is often difficult unless the fat guy is really packing, and if he uses the right entry method such as her on her side, lifting her leg up, you can get good entry that way.
It is not considered gay if an 800+ lbs guy lets another guy bang his folds.
I just polished off a box of donuts. I don't usually have them this late, but I had some extra White Powder Donuts around as well as some decaf Dunkin' Donuts coffee, and they go very well together so I figured that I might as well make a combo out of them. (GOOD MOVE.)
But anyway I agree with Bigger Fatter Woman that it is hypocritical to change ships midstream to meet society's warped expectations. Instead, sexy women of size should flaunt it. Just like Roseanne Barr, who has been large and in charge for a very long time on the comedy scene. For rich people, the downsides of being fat in terms of health, are minimized by access to the latest and greatest in healthcare advancements. So fat celebrities have NO EXCUSE to lose weight.
Just thinking about this whole traitor issue makes me really angry, and really hungry.
So, I am going to have a Bologna Boy Sandwich.
A Bologna Boy Sandwich is an entire French bread loaf, cut in half and then slathered with spicy brown mustard on each side. Next, we add a lot of slices of bologna on each side, so that it makes at least 10 slices thick on each side. OH, but I forgot about the CHEESE. We alternate American cheese with cheddar cheese, and alternate those with the bologna, getting just the right ratio of bologna slices to cheese slices to make it cheesy, but not TOO cheesy. The sandwich is extremely thick, and two feet long because I use two loaves.
I also make sure to have lots of onion rings on the side. My butler makes amazing onion rings, and is never skimpy about how many he puts on my plate. Of course, I also back 'em up with some excellent Heinz ketchup, which doesn't have many calories but it's very delicious when you mix in some mayo to make Russian dressing for the onion rings.
BELLY BOY, SNOUT
I agree Belly Boy about celebs. This started with Carnie "Vore" Wilson with her weight loss surgery and then Star Jones. Carnie's fattitude defeated the WLS ans while Star still has loads of fattitude she still is not packing on the pounds.
ReplyDeleteFat guys need to be with skinny chicks there is no getting around it. Fat women just have too much pride to settle for a second rate porking.
How is it NOT gay if someone else "bangs your folds?" And how disgusting is that!!
ReplyDelete@ Walter
ReplyDeleteGluttony is the great peace broker. Not only will gluttony make people too fat and lazy to fight, it will make cause humans to morph into something androgynous thus ending the battle of the sexes.
Thanks for your comments Walter.
Hey everybody, Belly Boy here.
ReplyDeleteFat Bastard is right, I have reached the stage where I am basically androgynous, since my fat level is so tremendous. To be honest, it's hard to even be able to tell what my gender is except for the fact of my facial hair.
Because of my belly's size, me banging a woman is not likely to happen unless she is very tall (or short?) and agile. Looking for the right chick, but I also need to keep mastering the ability to stand for an extended period of time. Or find a woman who can do all the work. OINK OINK OINK!
I am glad that you keep your height and weight trade secrets. Also your constitution, which is based on the traditional 3 to 18 scale scientifically used in Dungeon's & Dragons. All us fat people need to play D&D.
I find myself to be an exception to your apple & pear manliness vs femealeness thing. I am apple shaped but am very androgynous. As Fat Bastard stated, fatness is the way to end the war of the sexes. Not only will we be more like each other, but it is also known that many fat people are more docile than skinny people, and this also helps calm things down. Even aggressive apple-shaped SSBBWs have a limit to how aggressive and mean they are because they have to stop to rest and eat frequently.
So Walter, may you eat lots of delicious food and gain much weight.
Oh and guess what? I got a new wide-screen TV! This is going to make my video game sessions incredible, I was getting tired of staring at a 24 inch screen!!
oink oink oink!
BELLY BOY, OUT