Thursday, June 16, 2011

William Howard Taft

When it comes to presidents the best ones are always fat. This is not to say that all fatlings would make great leaders. What I am saying is that the greatest presidents have been fat. William Howard Taft aka Big Bill was no exception and like the other fat Bill he accomplished a lot while in office.
Taft the innovator
Taft was the inventor of the 7th inning stretch in baseball. It turns out that he was at a ball game and the seats were uncomfortable so he stood up to stretch and so did everyone in the ball park just to get a look at him.

http://quietmoment.typepad.com/.a/6a00e554e5b1be8833011168a5e493970c-500wi
Taft knew the importance of a comfortable bath so he created the first super sized bath tub. Was this guy a visionary or what?
Taft the statesman and humanitarian
EAT!
Taft sought to further the economic development of underdeveloped nations in Latin America and Asia through "Donut Diplomacy" but in return he had them sign the save the Land Whale Act that abolished the harpooning of American land whales and encouraged their feeding and expansion of natural habitats like Walmart and all you can eat buffets.




http://www.unclemelon.com/william_howard_taft_moustache_rides.jpgLike Bill Bubba Clinton, chicks dug William Howard Taft.

President Taft was also a freak like Clinton and like Clinton and other fat boys he was known to be a great and cunning linguist and it is rumored that his wife slept in a meat locker so she would have the meat scent he liked on her.




http://hydarblog.files.wordpress.com/2011/02/political-pictures-william-taft-damn-bathtub.jpg?w=398&h=512
I think what is most remarkable about William Howard Taft is that he was not only the fattest president but he was also the fattest supreme court justice. That fat boy Anton Scalia is going to have to eat a hell of a lot more pasta if he ever hopes to catch up to Big Bill Taft.
There you have it folks. The greatest man in US politics was a fat man.

No comments:

Post a Comment