Proud Fatling in Jazzy 1650
One of my heroes, Jackie Gleason always said, "It pays to buy the best." After much review it is our considered opinion that Pride Mobility Products make makes the finest power chair in the world. This is not a slight to companies like Hoveround who also make fine power chairs but as far as we know the Jazzy chairs are indeed the Cadillac of power chairs. They currently offer 15
models to accommodate people up to 650 pounds. http://www.pridemobility.com/jazzy/
These bad boys are built to last. Most will go 11 miles on one charge with a blazing top speed of 4.25 MPH! Pride Mobility also host and online community so that fatlings can socialize with other fatlings in the comfort of their own home. http://ownersclub.pridemobility.com/home
Bigger Fatter Blog's Fat Bastard and Proud FA give Pride Mobility and Jazzy two very enthusiastic thumbs up!
Another good choice for power chairs is the Hoveround. While Hoveround chairs maximum capacity is only 450 pounds their strong point is speed, agility and range. The Teknique® GT is the Ferarri of power chairs. This rocket ship has a range of twenty mile and will propel the average fatling at speeds up to a blistering 7 MPH. At these velocities you will always be the first on to the buffet table. When other chairs conk out your Teknique® GT will out-distance and outrun nearly every chair on the market.
CHECK YOUR BLOOD SUGAR AND CHECK IT OFTEN! There's no reason not to!
America's Favorite Fatling and Type 2 diabetic Wilfred Brimley is also the spokesman for another great fatling enabling company, Liberty Medical.
For over twenty years Liberty Medical has been providing free diabetic supplies delivered directly to your home for years now. Liberty Medical knows that our slothful life styles are important to us and they enable us to stay in the compfort of our own home as they deliver all the diabetic supplies we need. Liberty makes ordering a breeze because they even do the paper work for you. NO NO NO they don't come over and help you wipe your butt but they do fill out all the claim forms for y0u! www.LibertyMedical.com
You may even qualify for a FREE meter!
AMPLE STUFF
http://www.amplestuff.com/
A true pioneer in offering products for enabling us fat people continue our hedonistic lifestyles is Ample Stuff. For those of you who are new to fat acceptance Ample Stuff was founded by the founder of NAAFA and father of fat acceptance Bill Fabrey. Ample Stuff offers a cornicopia of products for fatlings. Ample Stuff offers unique and helpful products that enables us fatlings live the life of Riley. In September of 2008 Bigger Fatter Blog gave a long overdue salute to Bill Fabrey owner and CEO of Ample Stuff. http://biggerfatterblog.blogspot.com/2008/09/fat-acceptances-unsung-hero.html
Bill Fabrey was the first to introduce fatlings to the now famous ButtWand™ . The Butt Wand enables fatlings to grow fatter without worrying about how they were going to wipe their ever widening butts. The Butt Wand is a simple but ingenious way for even the fattest fatling to wipe.
ButtWand™ when you can no longer reach back there
Proud FA and I, Fat Bastard give Ample Stuff and Bill Fabrey big two thumbs up!
Breathe Easy Fellow Fatlings
Sweet dreams Fat Bastard.
If you don't have sleep apnea it simply means you are not fat enough so EAT! more. C-PAP machines are wonderful. They virtually do all the breathing for you. CPAP Wholesale has everything a fatling needs for treating sleep apnea. http://www.cpapwholesale.com/
CPAP Wholesale offers a complete line of CPAP and APAP machines, masks, tubing, filters, and humidifiers from top manufacturers like Devilbiss, Invacare, Fisher&Paykel, Resprionics, ResMed and Puritan Bennett.
The MONSTER truck of power chairs!
If it's high tech, raw power and high end performance you want look at what those whiz kids at 21st Century Scientific Inc. have been up to.
If it's warp speed you want nothing beats the Bounder. The Bounder is not for the faint at heart. This bad boy will hit speed close to an unheard of 12 MPH. These chairs will burn rubber but are not designed for hauling blubber. These chairs also have an incredible 40 mile range. BUT.. here is the caveat. These chairs are built for speed not payload.
Bounder offers their mighty Bariatric Bounder. This has to be the fat friendliest chair on the planet. When I read the specs on the Bariatirc Bounder and saw this beauty, my eyes welled with tears and my heart skipped a beat. The Bariatric Bounder has a forty eight inch wide seat making this amazing piece of engineering worthy of an award.
These bad boys are built to last. Most will go 11 miles on one charge with a blazing top speed of 4.25 MPH! Pride Mobility also host and online community so that fatlings can socialize with other fatlings in the comfort of their own home. http://ownersclub.pridemobility.com/home
Bigger Fatter Blog's Fat Bastard and Proud FA give Pride Mobility and Jazzy two very enthusiastic thumbs up!
Another good choice for power chairs is the Hoveround. While Hoveround chairs maximum capacity is only 450 pounds their strong point is speed, agility and range. The Teknique® GT is the Ferarri of power chairs. This rocket ship has a range of twenty mile and will propel the average fatling at speeds up to a blistering 7 MPH. At these velocities you will always be the first on to the buffet table. When other chairs conk out your Teknique® GT will out-distance and outrun nearly every chair on the market.
CHECK YOUR BLOOD SUGAR AND CHECK IT OFTEN! There's no reason not to!
America's Favorite Fatling and Type 2 diabetic Wilfred Brimley is also the spokesman for another great fatling enabling company, Liberty Medical.
For over twenty years Liberty Medical has been providing free diabetic supplies delivered directly to your home for years now. Liberty Medical knows that our slothful life styles are important to us and they enable us to stay in the compfort of our own home as they deliver all the diabetic supplies we need. Liberty makes ordering a breeze because they even do the paper work for you. NO NO NO they don't come over and help you wipe your butt but they do fill out all the claim forms for y0u! www.LibertyMedical.com You may even qualify for a FREE meter!
AMPLE STUFF
http://www.amplestuff.com/
A true pioneer in offering products for enabling us fat people continue our hedonistic lifestyles is Ample Stuff. For those of you who are new to fat acceptance Ample Stuff was founded by the founder of NAAFA and father of fat acceptance Bill Fabrey. Ample Stuff offers a cornicopia of products for fatlings. Ample Stuff offers unique and helpful products that enables us fatlings live the life of Riley. In September of 2008 Bigger Fatter Blog gave a long overdue salute to Bill Fabrey owner and CEO of Ample Stuff. http://biggerfatterblog.blogspot.com/2008/09/fat-acceptances-unsung-hero.html
Bill Fabrey was the first to introduce fatlings to the now famous ButtWand™ . The Butt Wand enables fatlings to grow fatter without worrying about how they were going to wipe their ever widening butts. The Butt Wand is a simple but ingenious way for even the fattest fatling to wipe.
ButtWand™ when you can no longer reach back there
Proud FA and I, Fat Bastard give Ample Stuff and Bill Fabrey big two thumbs up!
Breathe Easy Fellow Fatlings
Sweet dreams Fat Bastard.
If you don't have sleep apnea it simply means you are not fat enough so EAT! more. C-PAP machines are wonderful. They virtually do all the breathing for you. CPAP Wholesale has everything a fatling needs for treating sleep apnea. http://www.cpapwholesale.com/
CPAP Wholesale offers a complete line of CPAP and APAP machines, masks, tubing, filters, and humidifiers from top manufacturers like Devilbiss, Invacare, Fisher&Paykel, Resprionics, ResMed and Puritan Bennett.
The MONSTER truck of power chairs!
If it's high tech, raw power and high end performance you want look at what those whiz kids at 21st Century Scientific Inc. have been up to.
If it's warp speed you want nothing beats the Bounder. The Bounder is not for the faint at heart. This bad boy will hit speed close to an unheard of 12 MPH. These chairs will burn rubber but are not designed for hauling blubber. These chairs also have an incredible 40 mile range. BUT.. here is the caveat. These chairs are built for speed not payload.
Bounder offers their mighty Bariatric Bounder. This has to be the fat friendliest chair on the planet. When I read the specs on the Bariatirc Bounder and saw this beauty, my eyes welled with tears and my heart skipped a beat. The Bariatric Bounder has a forty eight inch wide seat making this amazing piece of engineering worthy of an award.
MOOOOOOOve over and give it up for the Bariatric Bounder! This behemoth is wider than some passenger cars! This love seat on wheels can haul a family of four thinlings or one super sized fatling. This road hog will strike fear in thinlings and envy in all fatlings. This is the Hummer of power chairs. Take this baby to Wal-Mart and be the King or Queen of every aisle. Can you say aisle blocker? Check out this bad boy at http://www.wheelchairs.com/
It will be years before this SSBBW will outgrow the venerable Bariatric Bounder and by then Bounder will no doubt keeps pace and offer a chair that will carry a large hippo. That is of course if she doesn't meet Proud FA at the next NAAFA convention and gets and invite to the pig pen. Proud FA needs a drool cup right now. That's a Sir Mix A Lot butt!
I know that there are major problems with our health care system but when it comes to accommodating the needs of us Fatlings the medical system get a B+ from Bigger Fatter Blog.
It will be years before this SSBBW will outgrow the venerable Bariatric Bounder and by then Bounder will no doubt keeps pace and offer a chair that will carry a large hippo. That is of course if she doesn't meet Proud FA at the next NAAFA convention and gets and invite to the pig pen. Proud FA needs a drool cup right now. That's a Sir Mix A Lot butt!
I know that there are major problems with our health care system but when it comes to accommodating the needs of us Fatlings the medical system get a B+ from Bigger Fatter Blog.
You bring up some very important products and issues that are faced everyday. You are right that mobility is a factor, but it also enables. I have worked with people who have lost their ability, due to atrophy, by exclusively using a powered chair. But, they are also life savers.
ReplyDeleteRecently, I found your blog and find it irreverant and very informative...yes, I can read between the lines. I was hoping that I could use some information from both the moobs and model posts from July. I have a blog that one would be good for and another that I write for that would be great for the moobs. Of course, I would link and mention you in both posts. See http://clinicallyclueless.blogspot.com/ and http://gosmellthecoffee.com/.
As our many readers know, the New Fat Acceptance is a positive movement. Instead of bitching about thinlings treating us badly we are about celebrating all the good things we have. I would not trade my fat and gluttonous lifestyle for the lifestyle of a thinling. We have it soooo much better than the thinlings. Gluttony has been very very good to me.
ReplyDeleteWe speak for the majority of the obese. We know that gluttony and immobility leads to premature death but like most Americans we feel that a slothful and gluttonous short existence is better than a long and spartan one. Americans are the biggest gluttons on earth. We lead the world in greedy gluttony and that is why I'm a Republican because we Republicans are the epitome of greed and gluttony.
I think we need to get while the getting is good because if health care reform is passed I have a feeling that they are going to scape goat us gluttons. Currently treatment for our co-morbid conditions accounts for 25% of the health care budget for Medicare and Medicaid. I fear that the gravy train for us fatlings may bet knocked off the rails if health care reform is passed. I can see it now. Americans will be forced to exercise. Our food choices will be limited and if Obama gets his way there will be a fat tax.
Our co-morbidities are an economic stimulus. The companies I mentioned in the article are only a few of the ones who are ceasing the opportunity to capitalize on this wonderful situation. Obesity is creating an economic boon for the health care industry. Doctors, drug companies and medical equipment companies are making record profits from the so called obesity crisis. Some people see obesity and gluttony as a problem but good old American businessmen are seeing the so called problem as an opportunity and they are exploiting it for all it's worth like good greedy capitalists they are. USA USA USA. In the meantime we EAT EAT EAT EAT EAT and ride in style!
Not only do you pigs gobble up all the food you fuckers are gobbling up all our health care.
ReplyDeleteGood afternoon Fat Bastard and Proud FA!
ReplyDeleteWOW! I was going to put up an article about the JAZZY on my blog, but it looks like you beat me to it.
Oh well!!! I'm working on a new article that I should have up in a couple of days. It's going to be about how I believe that super morbidly obese apple-shaped men should not be embarrassed to wear a speedo on the beach and how some cities has passed an ordinance against guys wearing low-hanging pants, and how this law discriminates against obese apple-shaped guys because they can't help it if their pants slide halfway down on their butts.
Anyway . . . . .
I love my new JAZZY 614 HD Bariatric Power Chair.
Ah! I'm now living a life of ease and comfort. I'm living life in The Fat Lane, living large and in charge!
I hope someday that I will need to have the The Bariatric Bounder with the 48 inch wide seat! But I would not be able to get into a bus. The Sun Metro city buses can accommodate 2 wheelchair passengers, but not one with a 48 inch wide seat. For that, I would have to use the Para-Transit. My JAZZY is much wider than most other power chairs that I have seen other people using, and I only have about 3 inches of clearance on each side as I enter the bus. I know one other person, a lady who weighs almost as much as I do, and she also has an extra wide power chair. It's not a JAZZY like mine, bit it's almost as wide.
I love the photos you have put up on your blog. I especially love the super obese beautiful pear-shaped lady with her huge ass! She is awesome!
==========
Clueless said...
"You bring up some very important products and issues that are faced everyday. You are right that mobility is a factor, but it also enables. I have worked with people who have lost their ability, due to atrophy, by exclusively using a powered chair."
==========
In response to Clueless:
Well, my muscles have already begun to atrophy a few years ago, but it's due to having Hypo-gonadism brought on by my falling testosterone levels, which of course, had been brought on by me increasing obesity. My muscles have been wasting away, and my penis has shrunken to less than 2 inches in length and my testicles have shrunken down to the size of a couple of grapes, so I'm happy to say, I'm sexually impotent, and I can't get it up anymore. I have also become a more gentle, timid, and docile, soft and weak, obese and sissified little wimp! So, I now feel more happy and contented now, a sleepy kind of contentment. I love being a soft and weak, obese little wimp! The power chair is exactly what I need so I don't have to walk anymore.
Continued below . . . . .
. . . . . Continued from above.
ReplyDelete==========
Anonymous said...
"Not only do you pigs gobble up all the food you fuckers are gobbling up all our health care."
==========
In response to Anonymous:
Fat Bastard says that "Currently treatment for our co-morbid conditions accounts for 25% of the health care budget for Medicare and Medicaid."
Need I point out, that we overweight and obese people make up about 70% percent of the population of the USA? Yet we account for only 25% percent of the total health care costs.
I have to wonder who accounts for the remaining 75% percent. Probably crack-head mamas giving birth to crack-babies, criminals committing violent assaults on innocent people, a polluted environment, workers being exposed to toxic chemicals, etc. etc.
Also, old age contributes far more to health care costs than obesity, because US citizens are living much longer. Even fat people are living longer than we lived a few decades ago.
Also, as for us fatties "gobbling up the food" well, I have seen skinny people who can eat a lot, and many of them eat mostly crap!
I have a younger brother, he is about 1 year and 3 months younger than I am, but he looks much older, he is 6 inches taller than I am, and he is skinny. Also, he has arthritis in his feet, has had to have surgery done on one of his feet, so he is not any more physically active than I am, and he actually eats more than I do, and yet, he is still skinny.
I hate to say it, but my brother is a total jerk, and a complete ass-hole! He's probably too damn mean and ornery to get fat.
Obesity happens mostly to those of us who are more gentle and docile, and sissified Nancy boys like me, we tend to become enormously obese.
So, as for health care costs, and gobbling up food, well, you can't blame everything on obesity!
Ya got that? JIMBO???
Anyway . . . . .
Getting back on topic.
I am so happy with my new power chair. It sure make my life a Hell of a lot easier.
Ah! Life in the fat lane!!!
Teddy there are some female reader of this blog who shall go unnamed who would love to see you in a Speedo.
ReplyDeleteAs to health care I want to be clear. We fatlings actually account most of the costs because we are 73% of the population. Of all healthcare costs 25% are attributed to the co-morbidities of obesity. I see than as a good thing. Look at all the technology that has come out of it. People used to complain about the NASA moon missions as being a waste of money but the costs of NASA have paid HUGE dividends that far exceed the upfront costs. Space may me the final frontier but fat may be the greatest frontier.
I would like to see co-morbidities become 50% of our health care budget. Necessity is the mother of invention.
21st Century currently has a modle in beta testing code named the Home Chair. It's their a model that will not only lift the fatling but it will recline like a bed. It gets even better. The chair has its own built in toilet that washes, wipes and powders.
ReplyDeleteA swing arm on the left side of the chair moves a small microwave oven in reach of he rider and a swing arm on the right moves a dorm sized refrigerator.
It would seem that the weasels in the old FA are committing suicide.
ReplyDeleteI love it!
Fat girls really are jealous.
BTW, I had a date with a skinny woman. It was quite platonic but I actually had a great time. We went roller blading. She's a friend for Fat Bastard. This is my first date with a normal woman since high school.
Fat Bastard says that my aversion to skinny chicks is abnormal. Fat Bastard only bones skinny chicks and he keep extolling their virtues to me. He talked me into it. I'm glad he did. Maybe I can start being attracted to skinny chicks. That would be good because I really want to have kids and I don't want to have kids with a fat girl because I want them to come out healthy.
W have had another date and It was even more fun than the last. We played tennis in the afternoon and at night we went to a movie and then coffee. It was really romantic. I think I could be sexually attracted to her even though she's not fat.
ReplyDeleteFat Bastard is telling me to bone her but I want to wait even though I could get wood for her. I never thought I could get wood for a chick that wasn't fat. This is so cool.
I hear what you are saying anon but their sluttishness is a big part of their appeal. Fat women are full of passion and greedy lust and they go ape for lean fit guys. They treat us like kings because we can get the job done. If you read Fat Bastard's article "Save the Thinlings" you will see the difference between them and fat chicks. Fat chicks are sluts.
ReplyDeleteI know that I need to find a more ladylike woman for a wife. Fat girls really are not the best mothers because they are so selfish but the sure like to fuck.
The thinling I am dating is really beginning to turn me on. This is the first time I am attracted to a woman because of her mind. I also like the fact that she like doing stuff other than going out to eat or to a movie. That's always nice.
You know, this blog is always ripping on Kate Harding, and yes, I'll admit she has a stick up her posterior, but you guys--in the last couple of comments--display a huge amount of hate for fat women as anybody but sex objects. How is "fat acceptance" about calling fat women greedy and saying " I really want to have kids and I don't want to have kids with a fat girl because I want them to come out healthy."
ReplyDeleteThe hate, it burns.
I'm glad Proud FA is dating a skinny chick now. I think he may be smitten.
ReplyDeleteYou are so right. Fat women should not get pregnant.
When I eat, all of my problems just go away immediately, and it makes me feel so incredibly good and even proud of myself. How many full grown men can honestly say that they've eaten an entire large pepperoni pizza with extra cheese, bacon, and sausage for toppings, all by themselves, and washed it down with 12 beers and not get even buzzed, and not feel full at all?
ReplyDeleteHonestly, about 90 minutes after eating that pizza, I went to McDonalds and got myself a Big Mac. Supersized, naturally.
Everyone at the local fast food joints knows me by name (if not by smell) and my favorite local bar lets me run a tab, which I pay off every time it hits $1,000, which doesn't actually take that long. I make it a point to get completely hammered at least three times per month, and it takes a LOT of alcohol to do that.
So, my only complaint about your article is that it doesn't include a shout-out to fast food restaurants.
Regards,
Big Lard Ass
I have written to many of the fast food places and asked them to provide a delivery service. I have presented McDonalds with the idea of a McTruck that will deliver food.
ReplyDeleteIn the future I suspect that food will be transported much like the way the transport people on Star Trek. Can you imagine sitting at your computer and clicking on a giant loaded pizza and wings and having it materialize right in front of you? That would rule!
I buy Everclear and 151 rum when I need to catch a buzz. I hear that you can get buzzed really fast taking an enema but I would need to pay some slut to do that for me. Right now I am smoking a lot of weed to see if I can restart my appetite. It sucks not being hungry because hunger is one itch that you love to scratch. Maybe I should mow down on a giant pizza whether I'm hungry of not.
While Teddy is not a medical doctor, you don't have to be a doctor to know that certain things are extremely likely to kill you. Putting alcohol in your rectum is one of those things, believe it or not.
ReplyDeleteIf you put alcohol there, it will immediately be absorbed into your blood, and you will die an embarrassing death. So please never do that. If you want to get drunk, then just drink lots of beer like I do. Or if you want to get drunk faster, have some mixed drinks, or maybe do a few shots and then have beers. But don't put anything up your butt unless it has a condom on it. That's what my gym teacher always told us, and he was right.
Regarding your smoking of weed, that I cannot condone. I have never done drugs (other than alcohol and food, and tobacco which I no longer use) and I never will either. I have heard that it makes people become lazy and unmotivated, and that they just want to stare at the walls and then go to sleep. That sounds boring to me. When I'm eating, I like to be fully in the moment, not distracted by chemicals other than alcohol. Alcohol always makes me very hungry, so I would perhaps suggest that you have some beers and then you will probably start to feel like having a snack. Then, order a hamburger with pickles, lettuce, onions, tomato, onion rings for inside the bun, and french fries inside the bun, and slather everything with Heinz ketchup, including both sides of the beef patty. Then have another six pack, and then go get some pork rinds and chow down on those, and you'll feel great.
So anyway, I would take Teddy's advice to heart. Absolutely never put any alcohol type of substance in an enema. I have heard of coffee enemas but I wouldn't even do something like that, because if I want a caffeine buzz, I just have a bunch of coffee (with lots of full fat dairy creamer, and lots of raw cane sugar, although maybe I should switch to sweet and low now that I am an insulin dependent diabetic). But alcohol is a different beast entirely.
Anyway, the New Fat Acceptance Movement needs you too much- we could not afford to lose you, especially over something easily preventable like that.
Regards,
Big Lard Ass