Defiant Kirstie Alley stands up for gluttons everywhere!
Thank you thank you thank you Kirstie for standing up to social pressure and not denying your gluttony. We at Bigger Fatter Blog salute you. We understand the courage it took to stand up to Hollywood and Jenny Craig. Your noble defiance is an inspiration to us all!
Hip Hip.... OINK! Hip Hip.... OINK! Hip Hip.... OINK! Hip Hip.... OINK!
Skinny Skank........ OR Gorgeous Glutton?
Real men know what they want and only a dog wants a bone!
Take that Jenny Craig!
Emaciated Kirstie covering her bones with Oprah forcing a smile.
Hefty heavy hunnies having a ha ha. Kirstie proudly showing off her ham arm. Kirstie flaunts her flabulous flab and Oprah shamefully covers her beautiful and buxom blubbery body. Both are truly happy when well fed.
See how much happier SSBBW's are when they listen to their hunger cues and EAT! They know there is a big party with lots of yummy yum yums after the show and that is more than enough to inspire their giddy gluttonous glee.
OK guys you know the age old question:
Ginger or Mary Ann? Fat Bastard would bone them both. It's a toss up for most guys but what about Rebbecca Howe Vs Diane Chambers?
Diane the stick Chambers or Rebbecca holy cow Howe?
Kirstie real women every where salute you you gorgeous girl glutton, you heavenly heffer, you sensuous sow, you plump pretty piggy! You are an inspiration to to girls and young women everywhere. You are a wonderful role model! You get the gorgeous celebrity glutton award!
OINK! OINK! OINK! OINK! OINK! OINK!
23 comments:
I admit it. I only bone skinny chicks but it has nothing to do with their looks. Fat girls prefer skinny guys like Proud FA because it is very difficult for two fatlings to copulate. It's like trying to dock the space shuttle with the international space station.
I fully support Kirstie Alley and her weight. If she wants to be overweight, that is her right as an American. If she wants to be thin, that is also her right. I mean, you can do it, but it makes you inferior to us fat people.
That's right- I admit it, I am a fat supremacist. I believe that fat people are superior to thinlings, a higher caste of our species. Thinlings are free to join us, but they have to put in the work. People like Proud FA are uber-thinlings- that means "above-thinlings", the highest sub-group of thinlings. But they are still thinlings, even though they are friends and allies of our movement, it has to be recognized that they are not truly what the movement is about. This is like the American civil rights movement, where white people also joined, but it is not really ABOUT white people. What makes this different is that the racial realm- all are equal. But this is not so in the fat realm, because fat is the manifestation of one's life choices, and therefore indicates one's true character and heart.
I believe that we are firmly duty-bound to respect and protect the religious beliefs of Kirstie Alley, even though they are controversial according to some people. I say this largely because of my own Church of the Faedari, which is itself a new religious movement- though much newer. Our church now has 11 officially enrolled members, many of whom are enrolled with rolls of fat.
Each of you is free to join as an Associate Member, for which there is no fee, but you will not be allowed to receive advanced Faedari training, or read any of my upper level materials on Transcendental Eating.
I have also completed my work on Rage Eating, Revenge Eating, and the Eating Frenzy. Each of these works is between 12,000 and 15,000 words long, approximately. It really breaks down the essences of these topics, and allows you to fully understand them with complete ease.
For example, Rage Eating is eating that is brought about by a sudden arousal of passion, though not necessarily anger. Rage Eating sometimes leads to an Eating Frenzy, which is characterized by extremely rapid caloric intake, and is usually followed by a catastrophic elevation of blood sugars. It is common to experience amnesia or "black out" during episodes of Eating Frenzy- this has happened to me very frequently; I suddenly "snap out" of the frenzy and see empty fast food wrappers all around me, or an empty box of pizza, plus crazy bread, et cetera.
Of course, now I eat healthily. But I still do need my Eating Frenzy, as this is a very powerful form of spiritual meditation in my religion.
Furthermore, I have now bestowed upon myself the title of DfE- a Doctor of Faedari Ecclesiastics. Therefore, you should refer to me as Dr. Reverend Big Lard Ass, or Dr. Rev. Big Lard Ass, or you can leave out the "Big" from my name if you want.
Regards,
Dr. Rev. Big Lard Ass
Dear Chinese Letters,
I may be only one person, but I weigh as much as four to five persons. And you can take that to the BANK!
I am also fantasizing about becoming a female boxer once I get my sex change, because I think that I really could be like the female version of Butterbean, and everyone would want to watch me beat up skinny 210 lbs women. Or I could be a female sumo wrestler.
I was shocked, though, to hear that for the sex change, that I would have to give up my penis. That is not cool with me. At all. I thought that it meant that I would just get a vagina added, so I am not really comfortable with the thought of losing my penis, y'know?
To lose a penis, and gain a vagina. That, is the question. I mean, I want to get BJs from my acolyte, who has a pierced tongue, pierced nippes, and a pierced clitoris! She has a lotta piercings! Brenda does not have piercings, and anyway, she is going to die of her diabetes and AIDS soon because she will never take any medication for it, because she says it is a human rights violation, a conspiracy, etc. She is crazy, and not in a good way.
In fact, I am going to Gastric GoodbyePass her. That means she will be kicked out of the Church of the Faedari. That'll teach her a lesson.
Oh yeah, and also- I have shaved off all of the hair on my head. I like my new look a lot, because it makes me look more androgynous, yet also more masculine at the same time, if that makes sense. I am going to make my acolyte shave hear head as well, because I find that look VERY SEXY on women, especially thin women, ohhhh yeah!
Regards,
Dr. Rev. Big Lard Ass, DfE.
Dr Lard Ass, Thank you so much for your insightful and inciteful comments observations and scholarly erudition.
Fatlings are indeed a superior life form. I do find some of the girls in the FA movement a bit arrogant at times and that is why I think the movement should be run by fat men,
Dr Lard Ass, Thank you so much for your insightful and inciteful comments observations and scholarly erudition.
Fatlings are indeed a superior life form. I do find some of the girls in the FA movement a bit arrogant at times and that is why I think the movement should be run by fat men,
Dear Fat Bastard,
I completely agree that the Fat Acceptance Movement is overrun by BBWs, and that most of them seem to have some level of hatred for us fat guys. They desperately want to not be fat, and have a negative reaction to us because I guess we remind them that they are also fat.
If only SSBBWs could take the reins instead. SSBBWs have the best leadership skills because they are used to getting people to bring them food, since they generally cannot move around very easily to get it themselves. They also don't kid themselves about how fat they are, and they admit that they love to eat, and that it is the reason that they are fat, and they would rather keep eating and gaining than be miserable.
I am glad that you and I are in agreement about us fat guys being awesome. We are brothers in (flabby) arms; fighting against anti-fat bigotry, promoting feederism and gainerism, justice, and the right to not have to work if you are fat, and also get BJs on a regular basis.
Here is something I wonder about- you know how NAAFA says that Healthy at Every Size bullshit? Well, how can they believe that and still be against feederism? If they think you can be healthy at 1,000 lbs, then why is it wrong to feed someone until they get to 1,000? Why not go for 2,000, or even 40,000 (20 tons)?
How much do you weigh, Fat Bastard?
Regards,
Dr. Lard Ass
P.S. As a doctor, I am prescribing myself... more food! Including lots of fish, which I eat every day!!
The Old Fat Acceptance movement is in a shambles and I agree 1000000000% that if needs more SSBBW's in charge. I would like to see mostly power chair bound people running the movement because more fat means more power. Instead of voting at meeting by the number of people I say vote by the pound. If hat were the case men aka BHM's and SSBBW's would be the overwhelming majority. What do you think of that.
One of the great gaining advisers is Dr Teddy Bear. IMO he understanding of fat anatomy and fat endocrinology is unsurpassed.
Proud FA and I were discussing you sex change and your desire to become a female boxer. We think you may have some roadblocks to that admirable goal.
As Dr Bear can tell you fat men often become sissies due to hypogonadism. All that blubber surrounding the gonads turns the testicles into ovaries. They begin to produce less testosterone and more estrogen. IN the case of the BBW and SSBBW just the opposite happens and they develop more testosterone and more estrogen. Their ovaries begin to act like more like testosterone. That is why they are so horny, strident and PMSish all at the same time. They very thing that guys like Proud FA love about them is the very thing that makes them so chaotic in the movement. They are highly erotic and highly chaotic. I suppose you have to take the good with the bad. BBWs are the ultimate alpha female with the emphasis on female. As you may know Proud FA is in a serious relationship with a slender woman because he wants to have kids and he figures that slender women would make better mothers. This lady that Proud FA is with is able to keep up with his tremendous sex drive so he has less desire to pork BBWs. As you know I only bone skinny women because of the mechanics involved and they fact that skinny chicks have lower self esteem and therefore lower standards - standards low enough to fuck a big lummox like me.
Back to your boxing. I suspect that if you stepped into the ring with some angry NAAFA girl or someone from Kate Hardon's Shapely Prose you'd get beat down. These BBWs are like men but a fucking lot more pissed off and crazy and meaner! Maybe you could beat one doing Muhammed Ali's famous rope a dope but you are not Muhammed Ali who could float like a butterfly and ans sting like a bee. I would not want to be hit by BIG George Foreman but I would not wan to be pounded on by an angry BBW either.
Proud FA could beat a BBW in the ring. He's dance around until they became exhausted and then he's seduce them with food.
Dear Fat Bastard,
I think that voting by the pound would be a much better idea- the fatter you are, the more committed you are to the movement and to the lifestyle. My vote should count much more than a thinner person's vote, because I am more of a human being than they are. The bigger you are, the more of a human you are, because you take up that much more space.
Sometimes I feel jealous of Proud FA, because he is athletic and muscular, and gets to pork a thin woman constantly, plus he has banged tons of fat chicks back in the day, whereas I have only been having sex for like 3 months, have had a massive heart attack, have heart disease, type two diabetes, male pattern baldness, and not a hell of a lot going for me. It makes me depressed and jealous.
With regards to me being a successful boxer, I think you are mistaken. I can bench press 375 lbs, which I do daily as part of my workout. Yes, I work out. I make sure to work out extra on my right side, because I like the unbalanced look, makes me stand out more.
I may be morbidly obese, but I could take on most people in a fight and win. I am 6' 7", which is pretty darn tall, and I have actually started taking boxing lessons at my gym. My height will give me a good advantage in the ring, and also my arms are very long, meaning that I could hit the bitches from far away, and even if they get in real close and clinch against me, I can still hit them in the side of the head, which would be a knockout blow. I could knock out almost anyone with one good shot from my right hand; I use 150 lbs hand weights with that arm every day, so it is strong as fuck.
Now, endurance would be a problem, I admit that. But if I am fighting against other women who weigh over 200 lbs, then they will not have much endurance either, being fat tubs of shit like myself. I will have a massive height and reach advantage over them. And if they are short, or not that tall, then they will have difficulty hitting me above the belt- and they will get disqualified if they hit me in the groin too much, and since I will not have testicles as a woman, it will not hurt to get hit there anyway. I will still retain my penis, however. I will have a vagina added, and see if they could add ovaries somehow, I don't know if that is possible, but I definitely want both a penis and a vagina, and to be a champion boxer.
Remember, I have been taking anabolic steroids for the last 2 and a half months. The results are paying off big-time, not all of my weight gain has been fat, and lately I suspect I might even be losing some fat and replacing it with muscle.
I go into different phases, now I am in a phase were I will not binge eat like normal. I am not going to have any "off days" where I eat pizzas and stuff like that. I am just going to keep training, and train as hard as I can so that I can get into excellent shape, and then be able to take on almost anyone who could ever get in my way.
I have also been working on my hand speed, which has increased a good deal.
Also, I can throw 175 punches with each hand in rapid succession before I start to get exhausted. In a real bout, that would probably be more than I would need to take down a BBW.
Regards,
Dr. Big Lard Ass
A lot of fat boys are strong. Fat Bastard and I think that the NFL team should get 5 400+ pound linemen for those goal line stands and short yardage situations. Recruit a few sumo wrestlers.
At 6'7" you would destroy most men in a fight especially if you have a case of roid rage going for you.
I think a really fat guy would do good in MMA. Get up to 600 pounds and just sit on your opponent. Don't shower for a few weeks and add a little chemical and biological warfare to the mix too.
Instead of float like a butterfly sting like a bee. Waddle like a penguin (that side to side stuff is scary) CRUSH like a boulder!
I really think you are onto something. Train like a sumo wrestler and keep injecting with those roids.
I know you say you are jealous of guys like me but just remember, the grass is always greener. Sex can be a lot of work especially when you are porking an SSBBW and it gets expensive. You gotta feed em! You can pleasure yourself with food anytime you want. Sure getting laid a lot is great but so is being a big scary glutton at an all you can eat buffet.
I would like to mention some things about porking and boning.
I have porked a lo more fat girls than I have boned skinny women and there there are differences. I can count the number of skinny chicks I boned but I lost count of the all fat girls I porked long ago.
As you know as a fat admirer I porked many at NAAFA get togethers and the action is fast and furious. Typically I would pork as many as 6 a day. Even though a fat girl is a lot hornier initially they lack the stamina of a multi-orgasmic skinny girl. My current GF is slender and she can keep up with my super libido whereas it would take 2 or 3 fat girls to last as long as she does.
Let's take Kirstie Ally for example. A skinny Kirstie once you got her in the sack would have more stamina than a fat Kirstie but the chances of landing a fat Kirstie are much better.
Oprah is a whole other story. Oprah is a like Rosie O'Donnell. She's a rug muncher. Fat lesbians will eat and eat and eat and then get something to eat and eat and eat and eat until one of them puts on a strap-on or they pull out a double headed dildo and feed each other while they ride it.
The reason Oprah is so fat is because she and Gail King are always eating out.
Dear Proud FA,
I have said for years that NFL teams should have a line of 600+ lbs men for short and goal situations. They would take up so much space that the line would not only be impenetrable, but also longer since the guys are wider. If the offense does not at least attempt to hold the line, they would get steamrolled by the fat guys, and the QB would get sacked by a fat guy's nut sack. I guess the only problem with this strategy is that it would take up too many spots on the roster for such a specific but common situation. Still, it could be an excellent strategy.
My other theory involves ice hockey. You get a 900 lbs man to be the goalie, and it would become impossible to score. You would win every game automatically, not even a team of 5 clones of Wayne Gretzskys would be able to beat you, since there would flat-out not be enough room.
It would not work for soccer, because the goal is just too big even for a 1,000 lbs man to cover. But a 150 lbs goalie can cover most of the goal at any given time, so a 900 lbs man could cover the entire goal without even having to move around. He could just take a nap, then eat a leg of lamb dipped in butter in between periods.
The only problem with this strategy for ice hockey is that it would be hard to get the guy onto the ice, and off the ice. You could get a specially modified jet for the team to carry him in, or maybe use a military Huey helicopter to transport him, but what about during the games? Since it would be on ice, the coach could just push him in front of the goal, not attempting to have him actually skate, because that would just make him injure himself.
For baseball, having a very fat (900+ lbs) designated hitter would be an excellent idea as well. He would have to be apple shaped, however. Since the strike zone is between the waist and the knees, and his belly would obscure this zone completely, it would become very hard for the umpire to tell what is a strike and what is a ball.
"But wait, the umpires will just call everything a strike!" you say. Not necessarily. Remember that most umpires are morbidly obese themselves. They will not discriminate against their own kind- rather, they will discriminate against tall thin pitchers like Randy "the Big Unit" Johnson, with whom they cannot empathize very much.
Also, remember Theodore Ursus (aka Teddy Bear) did research on hyper-endomorphic body structures. These bodies will have short legs, but giant torsos. So, that will mean that their strike zone will be lower and smaller than that of a taller, more athletic player. You want a very short, very fat, apple shaped, hyper-endomorphic guy with a class 3 or 4 pannus (belly overhang's medical term) that goes down to his knees. Then, the fat guy could just wear specially modified pants with a fake belt line that is lower than his real waist, and then a real belt concealed underneath the rolls of back fat. As soon as he gets hit by a pitch or walked, you just sub in a pinch runner.
Additionally, the fat guy would be highly likely to be hit by pitches, since his gut would naturally tend to make him "crowd the plate". Us fat guys can't help it- we love getting close to the dinner plate, and home plate! And the fat would cushion our bones from any real injury. A skinny guy like you, Proud FA, would probably get a giant bruise if you got hit in the gut by a major league baseball at 93 miles per hour. Whereas me, it would give me just a black and blue, because the fat would provide more of a cushion for the baseball, which would dissipate the force over a longer period of time (fraction of a second, but still very significant) and thus make it less damaging. So, I would have a black and blue over a wider area, but it would heal very quickly because it would just be superficial damage.
However I would not be a good candidate for this baseball position because at 6'7", I am simply too tall for this to work.
to be continued...
More sports stuff.
I don't know if I would be good at MMA, for the same reason that Butterbean has had mixed success there: us fat guys are terrible on the ground. As long as it is a standing up fight, fat guys will dominate with our power punches threatening one-hit knockouts. Body blows do no damage to us, so they have to go for our comparatively tiny heads.
If a fat guy has a decent chin (and believe me, I have several decent chins!) then he should be able to withstand some punishment- and then since the opponent would have to get in close to do that to me since I am tall, I would snap him in the left temple with a right cross and put him down. I could even get to use my right hook, which would definitely knock him out with a big concussion if I hit him cleanly in the temple.
Once he goes down, I would then flop on top of him, using my belly to pin down his arms and cover his mouth and nose. Since I would have not bathed or showered for over a month leading up to the fight, and I would be training hard up until like 4 days before the fight, I would smell furiously awful, and unless the opponent is gay and very attracted to smelly fat bald men, he would tap out immediately, or the ref would call off the fight after like 20 seconds or so.
In regular boxing, I would use my belly as a reason to pull my trunks up higher. Actually, I am kind of an ectomorph, but fat despite my normal nature to be thin. I was thin up until late high school. Anyway, my legs are longer than my torso by about 22%, so my trunks would be higher up. This would make it harder to hit me in the legal areas.
My initial strategy would be to use my gloves to block any flurry to my head, and get in very close, and clinch against him, try to back him into the ropes, which he should do naturally when I advance towards him in a defensive hands up position at the start of the bout. Then, once we clinch, he will be overwhelmed by the odors, and his eyes will probably start to tear up, or at least the smell will throw him off his game.
At that point, the ref will separate us, and I will commence administering a whoop-down of proportions matched only by those of my own body. Obviously a punch with my full power would be devastating, but only a horrible boxer would get hit by it because it would take a long time to wind up. That is why I am working on my hand speed, and also on more combinations, which are what really rack up the damage.
I am very upset about the fact that the only ethnic German to be heavyweight champion of the world was Max Schnelling, in the 1930's (yeah, under the Nazis. But he was not an anti-semite and he actually risked his life to secretly save two Jews who otherwise would have been literally murdered, so I consider him to be a HERO, PERIOD.)
So, for these reasons, I think I should probably go with boxing rather than MMA, but your advice and analysis would be greatly appreciated.
to be continued...
Do you use roids? Have you ever? I just use pill form roids because I do not like needles.
Anyway, you are right that porking women is more expensive than eating pork. Porking fat women is even more expensive, because many of them demand to be treated as "goddesses" and they want fancy Lane Bryant clothing that is more expensive than thin women clothes, and also you obviously have to feed them more (two or three entrees at restaurants can really pad the bill) and plus it costs much more to get them loosened up with liquor. That is why I got Brenda to come back to my place for booze, because bottles of liquor are soooo much cheaper than $5 per ounce at a bar, and BBWs, let alone SSBBWs, take a lot of booze to get sloshed.
I guess I do have some things going for me. You would have to have your shirt off to scare people with your pecs and abs, whereas I am just gigantic. Also, I don't know what your financial situation is- probably good and middle class, but I happen to have a net worth of over $1 million, not even counting my house or 401k, and I am looking into getting Social Security Disability money from having had a heart attack and being so fat, although I will probably not end up taking the money because then I would not be able to get a boxing license, and I would also feel guilty taking money from the program for needy people when I have more than enough money to support myself.
Plus, I have my acolyte, who gives me all the BJs a fat guy could want, and she has a pierced tongue and pierced lips, and also braces, which is a very hot combo to me. And she is young, and thin.
Anyway, I don't think all thin women have high libidos. Some do, but most probably do not. My acolyte has a pretty significant libido, and she is actually very into fat guys, and she kind of worships my fat sometimes, burying her face in it, and it is very erotic and romantic.
Anyway- are you saying you would orgasm 6 times each day during NAAFA conventions? Really? That is even more than porn stars can, so, if you ever wanted to make ~$400k per year while working maybe 40 weekends a year, you could enter the porn business easily since you could do 6 money shots per day, and you are muscular.
I could also probably be a porno actor since I am tall and have that "everyman" appeal going for me, but that wouldn't jibe well with my status as a reverend.
By the way, I tested negative for HIV again- and this means I am in the clear for good now!
Regards,
Dr. Lard Ass
A couple of things.
I never thought of a 900 pound goalie but that is a great fucking idea! He or she would be wider than the fucking goal! Even he worst team in the NHL would be the best team if you can't score on them.
As to my cocksmanship; I have been know to have 6 or more multiple orgasms and still remain hard as a rock but at the fuck fests in the pig pen I would pork several BBWs before blowing my wad. Even I would have to pace myself. It was also a great way to get Fat Bastard laid. I would tell some of the BBWs that they would have to pork Fat Bastard before I would do them the honor. What generally happens with a BBW is they get exhausted and many have COPD and diabetes so they lack the stamina and can only bang full bore for a few minutes and after they cum they are usually spent and need to nap.
As to making pornos I can't do 6 cum shots. My balls are drained after 4 but I still can have orgasms. Currently I am in a serious relationship with a lovely thinling and unless we split up my days of porking BBWs is over and as you know Fat Bastard only bones skinny chicks. That makes us both unpopular with the old girls FA movement. They hate skinny chicks and now that I am with one and because Fat Bastard only bones slender women they really hate us. BUT FUCK THEM! I have porked many BBWs and Fat Bastard has wanted to but they either don't want him because he's fat (THOSE FUCKING HYPOCRITES) or the mechanics of two fatlings makin bacon just don't work out.
As to your disability and your boxing career you are really in a tough spot. If you use your real name the state commission will not give you a boxing license. They will get your medical records and see that you have heart disease. You will have to box under an alias. If you search this blog you will find an article on how fatlings can legally scam Social Security. As a greedy glutton and as a fatling it is your birthright to get free money. Greedy gluttony is GOOD!
One of the greatest fat boxers is the Butterbean. He knows how to fight without expending much energy. All he has to protect is his head because his blubber protects his body. He may get some welts but that layer of fat protects his liver and solar plexus. He has more armor than an Abrams battle tank.
Fat Bastard and I would like to see power chair boxing so that fatlings with mobility issues can participate in the sport. Perhaps you could do that. If the boxing commission says you can't sue them under the Americans with Disabilities Act.
One heroine of the FA Movement is a fat girl named Jennifer Portnick. She sued Jazzersize because they would not allow her to be a Jazzersize aerobics teacher and she won. If you google her name you can read her heroic story.
I am not a true expert on the libidos of skinny vs fat chicks. I would say that they are about the same with a slight edge going to fat girls but what makes fat girls seem hornier is that they are less inhibited than skinny girls. In other words fat girls a more likely to be sluts. They want and demand pleasure and gratification. Hedonistic women are more likely to fuck IMO.
Hi guys. I'm 15 years old and I am 5'3" and I am too skinny. I am only 85 pounds. How can I gain more weight?!!!!!!
Dear Proud FA and Fat Bastard,
There has come to my attention a grievous attack against all fat people everywhere. Kevin Smith was forced to leave an airplane because he was considered to be too fat. This is absolutely outrageous, and completely evil.
SSBBWs and Gentlemen, this needs to be our rallying cry. The war is upon us, and it is time for us to fight back. It is time for us to choose- liberty, or tyranny. Will we be discriminated against forever, or will we all get together right now and make a stand, against anti-fat BIGotry? I think we need to get a letter writing campaign going, writing letters of support to Mr. Kevin Smith, and angry letters of outrage to the airline that kicked him off the flight, and also write letters to the FAA asking them to make it a rule that all airlines will have to replace their seats with bench seats, or at least 40 inch wide seats so that us fat people can fit in comfortably.
We NEED to get this going NOW. This is not a drill, folks, this is the real deal. I am calling the alarm, and it is going to be up to all of us, right here and now, to finally make this dark hour into our finest hour, into our dinner hour. We need to show the thinocracy that we are tired of their discrimination, and let them know that its OUR BELLIES and we have the RIGHT to eat what we WANT. We have to get these letters out as soon as possible, and write to every official we can, and hopefully some of them will see things our way, and agree to pass anti-thin legislation, or at least put fat-friendly laws into place.
My ultimate goal is to have a fat dominated society, led by us fat people, the Massive Majority. Before we pass laws to discriminate against thin people, we first have to convince people to get rid of anti-fat rules, then the second phase is to get them to introduce pro-fat laws (such as voting based on body weight), then we can pass laws to punish thin people for what they have done to us, and then finally we can subjugate the thinlings into a caste of servants who cater to our every whim, out of their genuine desire to do this, because all of them will be genetically programmed to worship fat, and to be unable to resist the sexual advances of anyone of the appropriate age and gender who weighs more than 350 lbs. This is what I call Fatopia.
The first step towards Fatopia is standing up for Kevin Smith, so that hopefully him and Michael Moore will make a movie about the anti-fat people and get more support onto our side.
Let's get going on this, and write letters to protest the anti-fat policy, and to tell Kevin Smith that we love him, and that we want to do everything we legally can to help him in his sacred battle.
Regards,
Dr. Lard Ass
Fat Bastard and I are torn on the airline issue. We feel that gluttons need to take the good with the bad and that the good far outweighs the bad. While Fat Bastard loves giving some thinling a good crushing on a plane or a bus he also understands that his girth can damage a frail old person.
Fat Bastard has paid for two seats and not grumbled but by the same token he thinks they need to offer 3 different size seats in planes. Large, XL and XXL. He would not be opposed to paying a little extra for a larger seat and by the same token if 2 thinlings can fit in an XXL seat they should be charged for only that seat.
Fat Bastard is the the de facto leader of the new fat acceptance and he thinks that we would get more support from thinlings if they were to see how much better their lives are because of fatlings.
Gluttony is good. It creates opportunity and innovation. Having 3 or even 4 different size seats sends a message to the world. It says this extra large seat was brought to you because of gluttony.
As a thinling I am comfortable in the standard airplane seat but if I were flying around the world I'd like to be able to stretch out and I would not mind paying 10 or 20 percent more for the extra comfort.
I think technology will solve a lot of the social problems fatlings face. I would love to see an anti-gravity device that will allow fat people to float like big happy fluffy clouds.
Transporters like on Star Trek would make travel a breeze for fatlings. Combine transporters with food replicators and fatlings can transmit food to each other. That sort of technology is closer than most people think.
Toilets will have automatic wiping capabilities.
Regenerative medicine will grow new body parts ravaged by diabetes.
Gluttony and obesity is driving this new technology. The world is a better place because of fatlings and their greedy gluttony.
GLUTTONY IS GOOD!
There is a paradigm shift happening and soon fatlings will rule. It is happening now and as long as we make sure that people don't diet or make their kids exercise fatlings will remain the overwhelming majority. Majority RULES!
Anonymous said... "Hi guys. I'm 15 years old and I am 5'3" and I am too skinny. I am only 85 pounds. How can I gain more weight?!!!!!!"
EAT! EAT!! EAT!!! EAT!!!! EAT!!!!! and don't move much.
Dear Proud FA,
Fat Bastard may be the de facto leader of the New Fat Acceptance Movement, however, I am the de fatso leader of the New Fat Acceptance Movement. I am also our spiritual/religious leader. Teddy Bear is our intellectual leader, as well as our cultural expert (regarding such things as fat fashion, on which he is an unparalleled genius.) You, Proud FA, will be in charge of Thinling Relations. You are like our ambassador to the thin community- they'll trust you, and they can relate to you, especially since your resume includes so many BBWs and even some SSBBWs (I'm assuming) in your past (I know you're currently only going to bone your thinling girlfriend for the foreseeable future, and that's okay by me. I just hope it doesn't make you turn away from the New Fat Acceptance Movement.)
But yeah, I see what you are saying about why you think fatlings should pay for two seats, but- what happened to Kevin Smith was different. He PAID for TWO SEATS. They then booted him off the plane when he got into one seat, so that someone else could take that seat. In other words, if there are 100 seats, and you reserve two of them, and pay in full, you will get booted off of the plane if two thinlings want to buy your seats, because the airlines figure two people is better than one person. I disagree. One fat man is worth more than two thinlings, I'm sorry, that's just the way I feel.
That's basically what gets me so upset. I feel that we are under attack. I am not allowed to go on an airplane without paying double, even TRIPLE the normal fare. (Yes, one time I had to buy three seats just for myself.) I know that I could not sit in one seat, I do need two seats- but I feel like the airlines KNOW about this, and so they should HAVE to either offer me a first class seat for free, or else start putting extra extra large seats in the plane for people like myself, who are becoming more and more common every day.
I can barely squeeze through the aisles, so I always ask for a seat near the front of the plane, to make it easier. Well, I am asking for a bigger seat, so that shouldn't be any different.
They should make an airline called SSBBW Airlines. They would have three foot wide corridors in between the rows of seats, and there would only be one giant seat on each side of the airplane. There would be SSBBWs as flight attendants, and they would wheel snack carts down the aisles every 15 minutes. The snacks would include things such as: inch thick cubes of salted butter with a toothpick through it, crisco-battered pork, peanut butter and lard sandwiches, and lots of bacon, as well as hamburgers and hot dogs. All pilots would be required to weigh at least 650 lbs. But we would also have a mandatory thinling co-pilot, in case the pilot has a heart attack or something. The thinling would have to weigh under 200 lbs and keep a BMI of under 30, but he would also be REQUIRED to wear a fat suit at all times.
I think it might be an interesting sociological experiment for you if you were to get a fat suit and wear that around town or something sometime, just so you could see what it is like to be a fat person. I think you would enjoy it, and then you could do like 40 pull-ups with the fat suit on, and everyone would be amazed at the strongest fatling ever.
I also have a question for you: back when you used to go to NAAFA conventions for sex purposes, did you prefer banging SSBBWs, or BBWs? What tactics would you use to get them into bed? I know some were married- did any ever turn you down? That'd be kind of hot, if every fat woman would cheat on her husband like that. You probably have like, 30 kids already, and you won't have to pay child support. Some of them are probably actually already obese children!! (Because obese moms over-feed their children.) So, somewhere out there is a morbidly obese version of Proud FA!!!
Regards,
Rev. Lard Ass
Hey Rev,
Kevin Smith had bought two seats but traded them to be put on standby for a earlier flight. He mosy have a a great meal waiting.
When is was porking fatling I really had not preference. The BBW's were more hygienic and that was a plus. We would always book a suite with a hot tub so that it would wash he stink off their private parts and clean out the candida/yeast from their cunts and their fat folds.
Usually I would go to the pool party all pumped and buff and most of them would swoon. Then I would flirt and get some competition going. Fat girls are very competitive. I would invite the sluttiest one back to the pig pen for a champagne session in the hot tub AKA Bay of Pigs. I would tell them swimsuits were optional. After a few drinks they all be naked and strutting it. Then they'd get to see my impressive package. There is only one meat a fat girl likes more than bacon and that's man meat.
I was never really turned down because my pre selection process was so good. I suspect that more than a few were married to fat guys and there were a few that I porked whose hubby's were at he convention. I think they had a cuckold or open relationship.
Because FA Bastard and I are like brothers I have a good idea what it is like being fat. I have pigged out and enjoyed he pleasures of food bu for me mobility and banging trump food. I know that I am in the minority regarding that as most people are fatlings.
Basically I was a drone servicing BBWs and SSBBW's but sadly those days are over for me. My mission now is to help usher in the New Fat Acceptance movement and make obesity and gluttony the accepted norm. That is why I am so impressed with you and Teddy Bear. Your ideas and perspective are vital to the new movement.
The 4 of us are the movement's think tank and inner sanctum.
I would encourage you to explore the fatosphere and promote this blog and Teddy's Biggest Fattest Blog. We need more recruits.
Hello, Just bloghopping. Great blog!
Be Well :)
Hey Lisa,
Thank you for checking us out and thank you for the kind words.
YUM, I would LOVE to do that big fat Kirstie Alley, She looks SO hot fat.
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