Just as sloth and gluttony has become fashionable so has the moob aka the man boob. Massive meaty male mammary glands are fast becoming fashionable. More and more men are flaunting macho melons. Unfortunately the fashion industry has been slow in recognizing the commercial potential of these hefty he man hooters.
Sadly for America, Japan has taken the lead in the development of men's over the shoulder boulder holders. America will be importing men's bras from Japan. Leave it to the resourceful Japanese to recognize the next big thing and beat us to the punch.
Nippon Brassiere company.
Fat men have enjoyed wearing thong panties for many years so why has it taken so long for clothing manufacturers and designers to produce a man bra for the unique man boob?
Above: Fat man flaunting his flabby fanny WWE's Rikishi show his ample ass.
Chips ahoy! Jack Nicholson growing his man boobs (moobs)
This guy needs a bird dog bra to turn his setters into pointers.
Vinnie Barbarino or Vinnie Boobarino?
American Idol's boobastic Simon Cowell sporting a perky pair
Macho Macho Moobs!
Big bouncy boy boobs!
The Japanese are always copying us Yanks
OK ladies you have seen a whole bunch of greedy gluttons with gynecomastia but now it is time to stop drooling. Proud FA brought up a serious issue, breast cancer in men. I decided to consult a fat friendly doctor for the skinny on boy boob blubber. Here is part of the interview.
Doctor Sizemore on Moobs
Dr Sizemore checking for breast and testicular cancer.
Fat Bastard: Dr. Sizemore, do men get breast cancer
Dr. Sizemore: The answer to your question Fat Bastard is yes. Men make up about two percent of all breast cancer cases, but breast cancer in men is often fatal because the symptoms are ignored.
Men would be wise to do a self-exam when they take a shower. Some men's chests, being flat, will be easier to examine than a woman's chest is. Guys like you Fat Bastard have breasts that are not unlike women's breasts. Soaping your breasts makes them slippery and that helps you feel the details of the tissue better. This is true for women, too, of course.
Fat Bastard: That sounds like fun!
Doctor Sizemore: If you find a lump, you should get a mammogram. I don't think there is a recommendation for routine mammograms for men, but because sadly so few protocols exist, I suggest you do your own extensive literature search.
Fat Bastard: Have you treated many men with breast cancer?
Dr Sizemore: I have had several male patients with breast cancer. I would like to tell you about one in particular.
Fat Bastard: Please do.
Doctor Sizemore: His first symptom was that his left nipple was inverted - it was pulling in. That began to increase and then it became very painful. One night, it hurt so badly that it woke him up. That's when he called my office. I found a lump so I sent him on to a surgeon.
The surgeon said he didn't think he had breast cancer, but he tested him anyway and found out what I had suspected. Eventually he went to a breast specialist to have the tumor removed.
Since this experience, I have run into four or five more cases in Herkimer alone. I don't hear the media talk about male breast cancer though, so I'm hoping to raise awareness.
Fat Bastard: We will be presenting this on Bigger Fatter Blog doctor. We too want to raise awareness. If I told my doctor that I suspected I had breast cancer how would he respond?
Doctor Sizemore: I would expect that many general practitioners would brush you off, send you on your way with some antibiotics.
Since we can't count on the media for accuracy and balanced reporting, I appreciate guys like you Fat Bastard keeping the public informed.
Fat Bastard: Are men with moobs at greater risk for developing breast cancer.
Doctor Sizemore: I really cannot give you a definite yes because the problem has not been thoroughly studied but I can tell you from my own experience that all of the cases of male breast cancer I have observed in my patients obesity was also present. That makes sense for many reasons. For certain cancers like breast cancer there is a link to estrogen. Fat stores more estrogen. There is also evidence in the medical literature that testosterone can prevent breast cancer. Being that fat men tend to have lower testosterone levels and higher estrogen levels then it would follow that they would be more likely to develop breast cancer. Fat also tends to store more carcenogens and fat people tend to eat more processed foods that are low in anti-oxidants. That too can increase the risks for all sorts of cancers. Fat people do develop cancer at a higher rate than lean people so I would have to say that it is reasonable to conclude that fat men are more likely to develop breast cancer than lean men.
Fat Bastard: As the leading voice in the new fat acceptance it is our duty to keep fat guys informed about health issues. Doctor, should men with boobs get mammograms?
Dr Sizemore: Most doctors would say no but they would be wrong. I strongly recommend men with gynecomastia have regular mammograms.
Breast cancer is another risk of gluttony and obesity. If you find the risk acceptable as we do then be fat and pig out like the glutton that you are. If you don't find that the risks outweigh the pleasures derived from gluttony then don't be fat greedy gormandizer like us. Because this blog is done in the interest of fat people we give you both sides of the story. I encourage our readers to examine their moobs regularly. Being that moobs are pretty much the same as boobs the examination protocols are the same. If you have moobs you should have a yearly mammogram. If your doctor does not schedule you for one find a doctor who will. In the meantime learn how to perform a proper moob self-examination.
At your service,
Fat Bastard and Proud FA, Leaders of the New Fat Acceptance movement.
PS I have asked Teddy Bear for his thoughts on moobs. For those of you who don't know, Teddy Bear is a the world's leading authority on obese anatomy and obese body types ie soma-forms. If you have not read his work on pear and apple shaped bodies please do. It is both highly entertaining and informative. If I may I would like to coin a term for the field of study Dr Gerald "Teddy" Bear has created. I will call it fatanatomy.
EAT LIKE A PIG!