Not too many people would fuck with me, Fat Bastard, and nobody would fuck with Proud unless they wanted a knotty hairdo, a busted lip and a concussion. On one particular winter day Proud and I missed the bus so we has to walk home. It was a warm winter day and there was plenty of good packing snow. As luck would have it there was this fucking bully walking ahead of us. He was a new student, a jock who was not aware of Proud's fighting prowess. I, Fat Bastard am a lover not a fighter but that does not mean I don't enjoy watching a good ass kicking so I decided to start some shit with the new bully. He had called me fat ass and blubber gut and Baby Huey. I wanted to kick his ass but I was not sure I could take him. I knew Proud could even though this runk had 4 inches and 40 pounds on Proud and 40 pounds. I bagan tossing snow balls at this fucker and he turned around and told us to knock it off. After he turned back around I packed another slushy snowball and hit this jock in the neck. He turned and I could tell he was really pissed he was about to attack and I said sorry man I won't do it again. He said that if I did he'd kick my fat ass. About a minute later I spied a car turd. A car turd is one of those big fucking brown ice chunks that fall from cars. This car turd was the size of a large coconut. Being a fat bastard and having no impulse control I picked up that icy fucker and fired it at the that mouthy dip shit and it knocked him silly. He was on the attack and not wanting to get pummeled I told him Proud threw it.
His eyes flashed with anger as he dove at Proud shouting, "you die asshole!!!!" The fight was on. For a moment he was on top of Proud but Proud quickly reversed the position and the ass kicking was on. Proud was on top and he shouted, "Fat Bastard, gloves!" With Proud sitting on this dickhead's chest he raised up his arms so that I could remove his gloves and with that Proud's famous fists of fury worked their magic as the beat out drum roll of this punk's face. Within a few seconds the blood was flying as Proud delivered one of his legendary beat downs. His fists connected with trip hammer speed and precision. In less than 30 seconds Proud had beaten this punk into submission and semi consciousness. Then to my surprise he said, "Finish him off Fat Bastard. Do it Earthquake style.
Earthquake was our favorite WWF wrestler at the time so as this punk laid there is a daze I dropped a few Earthquake bombs on him. I cracked a few of his ribs and he missed basketball season but it was a lesson well learned. We sent a message to other bullies. That is how to put an end to school bullying. Beat the shit out of the bullies.
15 comments:
I agree that bullying should be stopped, but I don't advocate violence.
I'm not sure if this blog is for real or not. It's always nice to see fat acceptance blogs though, and interesting that you put your own spin on things...
Hey Pam,
We are the new fat acceptance. As you know fat men are not welcome by organizations like NAAFA. We are the new and inclusive fat acceptance.
We proudly promote gluttony and weight gain and our war cry is the OINK! OINK!
I usually just let the bullies beat me up. It's okay, I don't mind...
Weighing over 1,000 pounds is really taking its toll on me emotionally. I need to find myself a belly girl. In order to do that I am going to have to go on a fast for two months to lose enough weight. All I'm going to drink is water, and all I shall eat is cabbage and lettuce.
Once I get down to about 500 pounds maybe then someone will love me.
belly boy, out
@ Belly Boy,
You just have not found the right woman. You need to find the right belly girl. The best place to find an understanding Belly Girl is www.fiercefatties.com
http://fiercefatties.com/ has very fat and very angry fat girls who would attack anyone who would attack you just like Proud FA protected me.
You need a little Boom Shakka Lakka
Boom Shakka Lakka you Need a fierce fatty.
They see you are a super sized Mac Daddy
Boom Shakka Lakka Belly Boy listen what I said.
Get with a fat girl the give the best head.
Think about it. Donna Simpson is sought after by millions of horny men. You just need to circulate and get noticed.
Maybe you should start your own blog and call it Belly Boy's Belly Blog. You could be the male Donna Simpson.
OINK!
Have Rev BLA cook you up a few Belly Boy Burgers and some Belly fries. I think you need to eat.
I was bullied a lot in high school but didn't because I was brought up with the idea that girls shouldn't fight. In hindsight, I wish I'd fought my bully, It would have been worth suspension.
Back when I was in school they didn't freak out of there was a fight as long as it was off school property.
Proud FA did most of the fighting and I would add the finishing touch by dropping my weight on them after Proud had beaten them senseless. Then I would make them smell my armpits.
hey guys,
I'm still in a belly boy funk.
If I had donuts I wouldn't do a belly boy dunk.
I've taken to having my folds looked after more, as there was too much mold in them before. Lifting the folds is really hard because they are so heavy, and I need to be sponge bathed (w/ full release,) every day. It's a lot to take care of.
I am cutting back on my alcohol intake too, and so far on my diet I'm really really hungry. I'm tearing through cabbage but it doesn't provide me with the calories my body needs as fuel to grow.
I now admit that I need some Belly Boy Fries. These are freedom fries boiled in lard, salted with Kosher salt, pepper, salt, and then I have it covered in chili and some cheese as well melted on top of it. Several pounds of it makes for a good meal or a snack, and I think I'm going to break my fast with some of that. And a nice steak as well... but I'm so lonely in addition to being so hungry!!
Ugh I wish I could just be normal and have a normal easy job where I could eat on the job.
I need to find me a female fat admirer who is super hot, like a supermodel. There's gotta be one out there for me!
Your first priority is to EAT!
Your second priority is to get laid. Female fat admirers are about as rare as rocking horse shit but they are out there. Have BLA find you a skinny hooker. That's what I do. I hire hos.
Ghetto Kid knows hos. Maybe you can ask him.
I think a good Boom Shakka Lakka may help followed by a few gallons of Ben & Jerrys.
Ladies and gentlemen,
We have a boner.
I repeat: we have a boner.
I, Belly Boy, have achieved the unthinkable: despite weighing over 1,000 pounds, I have achieved an erection, unassisted. This is one of my proudest moments! I GOT A BONER!! I CAN BANG CHICKS NOW!!
She will have to lift up my pannus first, though. I have my belly harness that might be used, as long as she can be agile enough.
I have a date coming over tonight, who weighs 90 pounds. She's asian. She is not a prostitute. She is a chemical engineer who earns over $100,000 a year. OH YEAH!!
She doesn't know that I'm fat, though, so we'll see how our date goes. I think I can turn on my charm and win her over with a timely belch & fart combo.
BELLY BOY, OUT
Tee hee hee!
I had a great time Belly Boy!!
OINK!
It always does my damaged heart good when I hear about a fellow fatling getting laid!
Those Jap chicks love fat guys and the fatter the better. Don the belly bra and bone this bony babe and give her a good eating out and tell her it form me Fat Bastard.
OINK!
@belly boy - you gave up alcohol and went on a cabbage diet... wtf?
I would rather go on an all vodka diet. Or whiskey. That would be awesome ;)
xxoo zen
@Fat Bastard - posted a pic of a sexy squirrel for ya. ♥Miss me?
Where have you been Zen. Yes I miss you and your potty mouth.
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