Monday, August 16, 2010

Upcoming Bigger Fatter Blog Articles

None of the other fat acceptance/fat pride/size acceptance/fat liberation/pro gluttony/pro obesity blog are covering the important issue. Luckily I Fat Bastard have competent staff of researchers like Proud FA, Thinnette, and Rotunda Hindenberg as well and expert consultants and contributors like Dr Gerald "Teddy" Bear, the most Reverend Big Lard Ass and the Chef so Bigger Fatter Blog has the people to cover all things fat related.

Here are some of our upcoming stories:

US Military: Fat Phobic?

http://www.access-ability.com/Trac_About_IRV_2000.jpg

In this article we will discuss normalizing fitness standards and the issuing of technology to accommodate obese soldiers such as tracked and armored power chairs, fat friendly cockpits in our air craft, pizza delivery to the battlefield and more duties involving the sitting and flying or driving remote equipment from the safe and comfort of the mess hall.


Dangerous Diets
http://www.fatguyshirts.com/pics/zazzle/fatkins

As our readers know Bigger Fatter Blog and the New American Fat Acceptance Movement (NAFAM) are not anti-diet. We know that many fatlings try to lose weight and we don't have a problem with that. We do have a problem with the weight loss industry and its rip off diet scams. We will provide credible consumer information on many of the popular commercial diets such as the deadly Atkins and South Beach Diets and their clones, the safe and yummy Pritikin diet and of course the greatest threat to the obesity bloom, CG Brady's Weight Loss Solution.

Fat Friendly Cars
http://www.davidwmsims.com/WPTooBigToFail/wp-content/uploads/2009/03/fat-car-1.jpg

We will discuss why bigger and more gluttonous cars and SUVs are good. We will confront the tree huggers and explain the many advantages to driving a gas guzzler.

The Best Comics are FAT
http://www.posters.ws/images/343636/chris_farley.jpg

Here we will be discussing the funniest fatlings from WC Fields to the late great Sam Kinison. We will delve into why Jackie Gleason was so damn funny whether once bulbous and bawdy Lisa Lampanelli has lost her sting along with her fabulous fat.

Bras for Fat Boys vs Boobectomy: The Beauty of the Man Boobs
http://www.wordpress.tokyotimes.org/archives/bra_man.jpg

We discussed this before in our article titled Brits Hate Tits (click here to read the article) but this article will focus on the aesthetics of the moob (man boob) and the male bra as a fashion statement. We will again offer some tips on male breast cancers, male breast enlargement and how fat boys can lactate.

Porking Fat Girls VS Boning Skinny Women 
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In this story Proud FA will debate the various pluses and minuses of porking versus boning. I of course will take the pro boning side and Proud FA will make the pro porking argument. Proud FA will proclaim that fat girls are sluttier and give better head and I, Fat Bastard, will discuss how skinny women are more hygienic, do most of the work and how they can get into more sexual positions. I, Fat Bastard, will win this debate.

Please feel free to leave a suggestion in the comment section of Bigger Fatter Blog.

14 comments:

Chunk said...

I'd like to see a fat pets article or a fat kids article. Feature ways to fatten cats, dogs and kids.

Best places to find fat girls would be nice and keeping with that a tribute to Walmart for being so fat friendly.

Anonymous said...

How about a fat of the future and call it future fat.

Speculate on what it will be like for fatlings 10, 20, 30, 40,- 100 years from now.

Feederick said...

I would like to hear more from Proud FA on both the technical an political aspects of feederism.

I would like to hear his thoughts on the Grazenhiemer method vs the Feedingham method vs the McGobble and Plumpner technique.

I believe that since NAFFA made its phony condemnation of feederism the entire movement floundered and splintered. I would like both Proud FA and Fat Bastard to opine on that.

Petunia Pig said...

I know that Proud FA is the Dean of Feederism but the Godfather of feederism is NAAFA's own Conrad Blickenstorfer. Do a story about him!

Fat Bastardo said...

WOW! Once again Bigger Fatter Blog's readers come up with some great article.

@ Chunk,
People love their pets and they love feeding them. Just like fat people have fat kids they also have fat pets. Food is love.

@Anon,

I love the idea of future fat as you put it. Capital idea. We have touched briefly on it but we should discuss it in depth.

@Feederick,

Proud FA and I would have to co author a piece about that and we would probaly consult with Teddy Bear as he is a scientific feeder/gainer and Proud is more of an instinctive feeder.

You are so right about NAFFA's blunder when they denounced feederism. Feederism is one of the pillars of fat acceptance and obesity promotion. The movement sure did decline and NAAFA lost even more credibility with that screw up. I mean what's a NAAFA convention without a lot of gaining and feeding and feeders and gainers??? That is what it really all about.

@Petunia Pig.

Conrad and NAAFA founder Bill Fabrey are the two most important people in fat acceptance and also the two most overlooked. There would be no fat acceptance movement without that piggy porker Conrad and Bill.

@ Lummox,

I think that depend on the woman. Manly men hating singly and non orgasmic women prefer a good eating out and of course fat guys are great at eating out in restaurants and eating out fat girls. We are good at restaurant eating because we want to be and we are good at muff diving because we have to be and we love the idea of eating. The same holds true for fat girls.

When it comes to womanly women the guy who has a big crank and can really work it will be the hands down winner. Eating is hot woman is just a warm up for a guy like Poud FA. Then he lays the dick to them until he owns them.

I don't think Proud FA and I can debate the issue because we pretty much agree on it. Also Proud FA is a pretty good cunnilingust as he's has a lot of practice eating out fat sluts at NAAFA conventions and everywhere else. BUT for fat guys there is no muff to tough but Proud usually did his lizard routine after the NAAFA pool parties when the sows weren't so rank.

Pepperoni Pete said...

I am looking forward to your new articles especially about pizza delivery my favorite topping is pepperoni. What is your favorite topping on your pizzas?

Fat Bastardo said...

@ Pepperoni Pete,

I could kill for a pepperoni pizza right now. Drop some behind enemy lines and we fatlings would mount a charge in our power chairs and Segways and vanquish the enemy. Add some buffalo wings, beer and Pepsi and we could take over the world!

Fat Bastardo said...

@ Pepperoni Pete,

Pepperoni is my favorite topping as well followed by cheese, more cheese, sausage, extra cheese, ham, extra ham, anchovies, peppers, and onions

Mike Hunt said...

Speaking of clams. Skinny chicks clams are like little necks and cherry stone clams but fat girls clams are like big tough chowder clams.

Fat Bastardo said...

Fat girl can get pretty funky down there. It's an acquired taste ans smell and definitely not for the faint of heart.

I think that because we fat guys a around our own fat boy musk we can handle the shrimp boat effect better than skinny guys.

Man of Girth said...

How about an article on clothes? I don't mean clothes that simply fit or you can hide in, but clothes that look GOOD on fat people.

Also go into practical stuff, like durability, comfort, what-to-wear-if-you're-a-food-spiller, is getting tailored clothes worth it, etc.

Big Fat Heretic said...

Sorry! But I'm afraid that I have to disagree about owning gas guzzling cars.

As the price of oil goes up, owning a gas guzzler becomes more expensive.

Also, our planet is about to reach peak oil production anyway, then oil production will decline as the oil that's left will become harder to extract from the earth.

Electric cars may be the way to go. The new Tesla is rather expensive right now, but the price of electric cars might come down if more people are willing to drive them.

Also, electric cars now have much quicker acceleration.

Oh! By the way, recently scientist have been successful at creating life, creating new micro-organisms. They recently created a living cell from scratch!

Remember when recombinant DNA technology first came out?

The insulin I use is a product of recombinant DNA. Scientist had genetically engineered a species of bacteria to produce human insulin as the culture grows.

Now they recently produced a bacteria culture that is genetically engineered to produce diesel, and they have produced about 100 gallons in the lab from bacteria cultures.

Eventually they will be able to increase production to the point where we won't have to import oil from Arab countries anymore, but it might take another decade.

Yeah! We can make diesel now! Soon, we won't have to get it out of the ground anymore, because we can now make it ourselves.

Also, bio-fuels can be made from a certain species of green algae. We just need more time to grow large cultures of the algae to produce it in greater quantities.

When we get to the point where we won't have to import oil anymore, then the Arabs won't be able to sell us their rotten oil to make money to support world wide terrorism.

Then those Islamic Fascist Nazi camel-jockeys can just go pound sand up their collective ass!

We can send them goat-fuckers back to the stone age!

But we still need to focus more on electric cars as well to cut down on pollution and greenhouse gasses.

Sorry to have to disagree about owning gas guzzling cars.

But new technology trumps the old ways of doing things.

Man of Girth said...

Probably the best energy/oil consumption flash video on the 'Net:

http://jayhanson.us/l1.html

I loves me a Mustang, but I think my next vehicle will be a motor scooter. :p

Fat Bastardo said...

Nothing like a Mustang!