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Friday, January 21, 2011

Bigger Fatter Blog Endorses The Heart Attack Grill Diet Program

When Proud FA and I Fat Bastard started the New American Fat Acceptance Movement (NAFAM) we decided that we would never endorse a diet plan. While Bigger Fatter Blog and NAFAM are not anti-diet or anti weight loss we decided in order to remain unbiased that we would remain neutral on diets. As you all know, we do condemn weight loss surgery.

Rules are made to be broken, some monoliths must fall and nothing is set in stone. We have decided after much scientific investigation to endorse the Heart Attack Grill diet program. Other than CG Brady's Weight Loss Solution not other diet plan even came close to delivering what it promised until now. We are happy to report that Dr Jon's Heart Attack Grill Diet does indeed deliver what it promises. We are so impressed with the results of the Heart Attack Grill Diet that we will be asking the Dr Jon and is staff to cater the first annual NAFAM and fat porn convention.

Link to the Hear Attack Grill Click HERE

To call the Heart Attack Grill fat friendly would be the understatement of the year. If there is Heaven on earth for us fatlings it is the Heart Attack Grill (HAG). If there ever was messiah it's Dr John and if there are angels it would be the nurses on his staff. Those thinling angels are every fat boy's wet dream.

The HAG has raised the bar for fast food restaurants everywhere. Can you think is another restaurant that offers FREE meals to fatlings over 350 pounds? The glutton fare and portion sizes are big enough for and tasty enough for any glutton. Even our own Belly Boy the glutton's glutton gives the HAG 2 thumbs up.

The Heart Attack Grill or HAG is not without it's critics but Dr Jon has silenced most of them. Hey, you gotta die from something so it might as well be from something you like a tasty Quadruple Bypass Burger and unlimited Flat Liner Fries.


Pig said...

10,000,000 Oinks to the 10th power!

Anonymous said...

If we had a few more of these places we could get rid of all you fat scumbags.


Proud Plumpette said...

The Heart Attack Grill is an experience every glutton should have atleast once in their lives. Lard-soaked bread, half pound patties, and delicious lard-cooked french fried potatoes. An OINK of approval.

Hubby and I are planning a trip to Arizona for our anniversary in October. He's taking me to Heart Attack Grill TWICE on our outing if I hit 500lbs by then.

Fat Bastard said...

@ Proud Plumpette,

I think that every fatling should make a pilgrimage to the Heart Attack Grill. The HAG is a shrine to gluttony.

Anonymous said...

Took the wife there last year while visiting friends in Arizona. She downed a quad bypass, fries and four cokes. It was touch and go for awhile as I didn't think she was going to be able to finish but she did it. Unfortunately they didn't have a bariatric wheel chair to wheel her out our car. The burgers aren't the best we've ever had but they're pretty damn good and they do give you one hell of a lot of food. All in all I think every fatty should try it at least once.

BLA said...

Every true glutton knows that when it comes to food, quantity beats quality every time. However, the discerning glutton also enjoys fine dining, having nice meals such as milk steaks.

Any woman who can down a Quad Bypass burger and top it off with flatliner fries, and four cokes, is definitely a quality woman. Plus, the burger was free since she weighs over 350 lbs, which is a nice bonus.

So I applaud you for your excellent choice in restaurants; I think you'll agree that for gluttons who are visiting Chandler, AZ, the Heart Attack Grill is a must-visit establishment. It's also a great way to convert a normal chick into a fat chick in just a few months.

Simply take here there 1 or 2 times per week, and challenge her to eat as much as she can, and tell her how much it turns you on. Then, be sure to give her lots of positive reinforcement, so that she associates eating with pleasure. Then before you know it, fattitude will kick in and she will be obese for life! As a side bonus, everyone knows that most fat chicks are very loyal to their boyfriends/husbands, since they are conditioned to believe that almost no men would want them. On the other hand, a thin chick has guys hitting on her all the time, and will cheat on you at the first chance she gets. No matter how loyal they may seem, most thinlings are NOT to be trusted. Only fat people are capable of true loyalty, because only fat people truly love themselves, and in order to be loyal to others, you have to first love yourself.


Fat Bastard said...

The HAG is a shrine and a monument to American greed and gluttony. I do think that Dr Jon may want to increase the size of the Quadruple Bypass Burger because if any 350 pounder has the the discipline to not eat for a few hours before eating the Quad they could polish one of with ease. They should produce a super quad with each patty weighing a 1/2 pound.

Rev I have to disagree about fat girls. They get laid a lot. There are a lot of FA's out there more than willing to pork a fat girl and I think most fat girls know that.

Skinny girls simply are not as sluttish. They may get more attention from certain guys but they have fat less sex partners that fat girls. Fat girls are uninhibited when it come to pleasure. They have the best of both worlds. Proud FA's creedo has been find em, feed em, fuck em.

BLA said...

@Fat Bastard

The Quad IS the "Super Quad", since each patty is 1/2 a pound. In other words, the Quad has 2 pounds of beef.

I think they should make a Super Quad that has patties totaling 4 lbs of beef, and call it the Emergency Quadruple Bypass Burger.

Here's the thing about fat girls- the NAAFA ones, you're right. They know about FAs and are not ashamed to be used & abused by them, and thus they get gluttony as well as sex. However most fat chicks are very inhibited and just try to blend into the background, not wanting to draw attention to themselves because they learned in high school that if they drew attention to themselves they would get made fun of.

Of course sometimes fat chicks reach the personality type of Happy Fat Chick. In that case, they are jolly and happy and learned that by projecting that image, people would look past their fatness somewhat, and they could have friendships and date fat guys and/or FAs easily. Whereas the shyfats would be afraid and suspicious of a non-fat FA who approached them acting nice, because they had this happen to them in high school and the guy would then make fun of her.

Thin chicks, the good looking ones, usually sleep around a lot in college. Many are vain and materialistic to the extreme, and are money gluttons. So they'll be loyal to their guy until they meet one who earns more money than their current husband. It's just the way of the world- the more desirable you are the more options you have and skinny good looking chicks have the most options and are thus the least loyal.

You get a fat ugly chick with an outgoing personality, who has buried her body image issues and embraced her elephantine body, and she'll be more loyal than any stick-thin model type ever could be.

Of course there are exceptions, but they are as rare as fatlings who got fat through means other than gluttony.



Fat Bastard said...

@ BLA,

Do you think maybe there should be an intermediate burger between the regular Quad and the Super Quad? Perhaps an "Urgent Quad" weighing in at 3 pounds then the 4 pound Emergency Quad. I have an extra artery they call a collateral artery that is 50% blocked. That made me think that they should add an extra patty to the Quad and call it the Quint and make only available to post bypass patients.

I recently got an email from a reformed FA telling me about a forum called Happy Fat Girl Forum. I checked it out and there are is some talk about NAAFA womyn there. This guy Kyle is really trashing Dimensions Magazine for exploiting fat girls but the fat girls are defending Dimensions so once again the FA movement shows its less than honest side. At first I thought it was Proud FA breaking my balls but after I read Kyle's posts I could tell it was not Proud.

BLA said...

The intermediate quad sounds like a good idea, as long as enough mayo, cheese, and ketchup are added in order to preserve the delicate balance of flavors and the composition of the grease.

As for collateral arteries, in people with heart disease, the body undergoes some special efforts to keep you alive. The heart enlarges and the walls thicken, to keep up with the extra demand. Arteries widen to respond to the clogging around the inside. And arteries that are normally separate can combine to make detours around more blocked areas of the heart in order to keep enough blood flowing. Those are your collateral arteries, which develop out of smaller unconnected arteries that everyone has.

As for the Quint, I think they should serve it to heart attack survivors, adding 1 extra patty per heart attack survival. So in your case, it would have 6 patties. Of course you would also have to weigh 350 lbs to be eligible, which I'm not sure if you are anymore, but I did read that you got back on your feed, and are now gaining again.

OINK OINK OINK! To hell with the consequences!! OINK OINK OINK! I've put on some fat in addition to my muscle, but I have an enormous amount of muscle now. My gut is back, and I'm trying to get some wrestling gigs lined up. Especially if I could find a really tall chick to wrestle, since I'm 6'8".

Very interesting information about the reformed FA. I don't really understand that concept to be honest, Proud FA is the only person I've ever heard of who got rid of a fetish. Normally, what you are into is what you are into, and just like those religious camps for gay guys doesn't make them straight, I would think that if you have a fetish then there's nothing you can do become "normal". Like guys who like huge boobs, nothing will make them not like huge boobs, thus the plastic boob surgery boom.

Also one other thing, shouldn't Proud FA now be Former FA? If he's not an FA anymore, I mean. I don't know how I feel about FA-reversal surgery (I consider it surgery even though it doesn't involve cutting, etc) because it takes men off the market for fat chicks, who already have a very difficult time finding guys who will commit to them. I agree that Proud FA is better off, but society as a whole is going to be very fucked up if more FAs have the surgery.

I'm in favor of making being a FA the norm, for all but the worker drones. In Ancient Greece fat was considered the most attractive thing possible for a woman, and Helen of Troy was super morbidly obese and had a unibrow, which was also considered sexy.

We will splice genes into fat white dudes to give them boners like the Ghetto Kid has, and then they'll be able to have sex with fat chicks easily, even if their gut is big. Between lifting up your gut, and having a 12+ incher, only someone like Belly Boy would be unable to have sex. Belly Boy is unfortunately in severe denial about 1 inch being small, though. But it's probably better for him to be in denial.


Fat Bastard said...

@ BLA,

I have managed to pork a few fat girls and it was a real chore. I'd much rater eat even a shitty meal.

Even an average fat guy has to be seriously donged in order to pork a fat girl. Belly Boy would need a cock transplant to pork a fat girl and they'd have to get that cock from a large stallion. Even if he were blessed with Ghetto Kid's dick he's still come up short.

Fat girls love guys like Ghetto Kid because Tupac was right when he said that skinny Niggas can really throw the dick but like Proud FA Ghetto Kid will need more than one fat girl because even though they got all that padding around their big fat beavers they still lack the stamina to handle a good rogering just like us fat boys don't have the stamina to deliver a good rogering.

Anonymous said...

@ Fat Bastard

Fat chicks don’t need stamina. They just need to lay there like a beached whale and grunt and moan. As long as that big fat pussy is accessible who cares if the pork queen is in good enough shape to keep up. In fact it’s better if she isn’t because sometimes trying to tame the wild hog can be very dangerous. Take it from a guy who has been a life long fatty fucker, all a fat girl needs is a place to lay down and some help keeping her pussy accessible and even if she passes out, that big fat sloppy pussy ain’t going no where. In other words you can ride that hog all night long if you want.

Fat Bastard said...

@ Wolf,

That's the problem. They just lay there the way us fat boys do when we got a skinny ho riding us like Shamu at Sea World. Proud FA tells me they start out hot but after 10 minutes or so they become real duds in bed. That's why he used to pork 3 or four a day.