Friday, January 14, 2011

Oprah is in Denial: Oprah is a Glutton!

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She's fat!

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She's thin!

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She's thin! She's FAT!

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She's FAT!

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She's sorta thin!

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She's Fat!

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MAKE UP YOUR FUCKING MIND! SHEEESH!



Oprah has excuse after excuse. Her latest on is that she is depressed. A few years ago it was because she has "blown out" her adrenal glands. Sorry Oprah and all you other fat girls who are in denial; depression and adrenal fatigue does not change the laws of physics and cause you to gain weight. Admit it Oprah; you along with 73% of Americans are gluttons. You need to either shit or get off the pot. (if you clog it up there is a really good article on Bigger Fatter Blog on how to unclog toilets.)

Oprah is setting a bad example for other girl gluttons. Fat girls look up to Oprah and frankly that is not a good thing. She sets a horrible example. She makes people think that being fat is a bad thing. She also denies her gluttony. That sort of thinking is what has damaged the entire fat acceptance movement.

Oprah has all these weight loss charlatans/gurus like Dr Phil and Bob Greene at her disposal. She even has a personal chef and still she chooses to eat like a happy little piggy. OINK!

A muscle head on another news group echoed my sentiments. "She has every single resource in at her fingertips. All the money in the world, and yet, she still has gained weight. I have heard people proclaim that ‘if they had the resources of these celebrities, they would look great too.’ I have always called “BS” on that. It has less to do with resources and much more to do with hard work and discipline. There is nothing that Oprah cannot buy…trainers, programs, nutritionists, cooks, etc… yet, her lack of discipline is the cause of her weight gain…its that simple"

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Oprah is fat because she and her "best friend" Gayle King are always eating out with Oprah doing most of the eating.


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Oprah and Gayle King

Oprah needs to come clean and admit that she is a fat girl glutton. She needs to tell her disciples that gluttony is good but before she can do that she needs to admit it to herself. Oprah, GLUTTONY IS GOOD!

Look how well gluttony has served Oprah. She's filthy rich and now she has her own network called OWN.  The Oprah Winfrey Network. That's fattitude and egoism to the max! Perhaps when Oprah comes to her senses she will help me, Dr Bear and Rev BLA produce the Biggest Gainer.

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You go girl! EAT!

10 comments:

Mike Hunt said...

Yep. Oprah surely sends the wrong message to both fat girls and skinny women.

Oprah is a glutton and her feeble excuses make me sick. I hope that CG Brady opines on this and if he does I think he will say that Oprah needs to lose the fattitude. I would not agree because it is Oprah's fattitude that helped her to rise to the queen of television.

If you are reading this Oprah, DO NOT lose your fattitude. If you lose the fattitude you will lose your edge.

Oprah, you need to get fatter and fatter and fatter. I would like to see you cruise out on your next show in a bariatric scooter with a nose hose and an oxygen tank. Keep your fattitude and stop your weight loss nonsense!

Boy Gorge said...

Quit picking on Oprah!

Big Lard Ass said...

Bad news everybody.

Belly Boy had an impacted fecal mass, and had to be taken to the hospital. The doctors administered laxatives which successfully dislodged some of the mass, but not all of it, which the rest had to be removed through mechanical means.

The doctors advised him to undergo a Lap Band procedure to control his obesity, and predicted that within 1 year he could lose 600 lbs, and within 3 years he could weigh just 500 pounds. Belly Boy is considering it because he is very depressed, and when I talked to him on the phone he told me that he really wants his own TV show, and that he misses his family so much, and also he complained about his diabetes requiring so many painful injections all the time.

The doctors also found car keys embedded in Belly Boy's buttocks, which apparently his dad lost the keys and Belly Boy sat on them, and the flesh grew around them. This has been causing him massive discomfort, and he is going to have the keys surgically removed. This should make it more easy for him to sit and lay down comfortably.

I don't know what to tell him, but it sounds like he is seriously considering the Lap Band even though I told him he could go for the world record and perhaps marry another hyper morbidly obese person and become the world's fattest couple and get a TV show that way. But it's hard for him to find someone to marry, because he is so shy and smelly.

Regards,

BLA

Mike Hunt said...

Big Lard Ass said...

Bad news everybody.

Belly Boy had an impacted fecal mass, and had to be taken to the hospital. The doctors administered laxatives which successfully dislodged some of the mass, but not all of it, which the rest had to be removed through mechanical means.

The doctors advised him to undergo a Lap Band procedure to control his obesity, and predicted that within 1 year he could lose 600 lbs, and within 3 years he could weigh just 500 pounds. Belly Boy is considering it because he is very depressed, and when I talked to him on the phone he told me that he really wants his own TV show, and that he misses his family so much, and also he complained about his diabetes requiring so many painful injections all the time.

The doctors also found car keys embedded in Belly Boy's buttocks, which apparently his dad lost the keys and Belly Boy sat on them, and the flesh grew around them. This has been causing him massive discomfort, and he is going to have the keys surgically removed. This should make it more easy for him to sit and lay down comfortably.

I don't know what to tell him, but it sounds like he is seriously considering the Lap Band even though I told him he could go for the world record and perhaps marry another hyper morbidly obese person and become the world's fattest couple and get a TV show that way. But it's hard for him to find someone to marry, because he is so shy and smelly.

Regards,

BLA

Fat Bastard went on a meat and cheese binge recently and he had a slight fecal impaction and boy was he a real growly bear. All I could say is sheeesh what a grouch. After some some chocolated Ex Lax and 8 Fleets enemas Fat Bastard found blessed relief.

Keys embedded in his butt flesh? WOW! I once porked an SSBBW who sat on a pork chop bone and the doctor think it had been there fore several years.

As you can guess Fat Bastard is livid about the notion of some butcher carving on Belly Boy. I also hope that they don't go that route with him.

Rev, is there any reason for why they won't give him an insulin pump. A lot of the BBWs I used to pork had insulin pumps. When you get as big as Belly Boy insulin injections are tough.

Give my best to Belly Boy and his family and then give him a few Belly Boy Burgers.

I think maybe Belly Boy is NOT eating enough. You need food to push food through.

Mike Hunt said...

One more thing; I really think we need "Dr" Gerald "Teddy" Bear to weigh in on this.

BLA said...

@Proud FA

I also forgot to tell you about Belly Boy's other medical condition. He suffers from what is known as a micro-phallus, meaning that his penis is really small, even less than 1 inch in his case.

The doctors performed the surgery to remove the keys, and they also found and removed a candy wrapper that was not picked up on the X-ray, as well as a few coins. They said that this was a first for them, and that Belly Boy should make a full recovery soon, although he will be very sore for awhile.

As for why he cannot use an insulin pump, they will not prescribe him one because they say that you have to check your blood sugar at least 4 times a day to get one, and Belly Boy refuses to make that promise. He is very honest and refuses to lie. He hates checking his blood sugar ever, because of the painful needles, and it is also a downer for him in general.

As for Belly Boy Burgers, I can't give any to him since he is in California, over a thousand miles away from me, but I did tell him to eat a lot, to keep his strength up. He is on quadruple feeding schedule at the hospital, and his butler is bringing him home-cooked meals as well.

Belly Boy is trying to seduce one of the nurses, but it isn't working. He's very upset and thinks it is because of his micro-phallus, but I've told him repeatedly that what matters is belly size, and he can get men and women to sleep with based on that.

As for me, I am doing well with my boxing training and am ready to begin inter-gender boxing matches against women if I could find any willing to box me, which I cannot. I am still not ready to box men, even though I have seen all of the Rocky movies at least 3 times.

Regards,
BLA

Fat Bastardo said...

I'd like to think Proud FA for filling in for me while I was recovering from my fecal impaction.

I hope they don't go through with the surgery on Belly Boy. I am happy to hear that the found the keys, coins and candy wrappers.

Nurses are hard to pick up because every guy hits on them. I do think with enough persistence Belly Boy will land a hot nurse.

I am slightly off my feed to to the fecal impaction but I am doing better and I will be back in full feed mode very soon.

Maybe BLA your should wrestle girls. You know the old saying, "maybe she can't wrestle but you ought to see her box".

Anonymous said...

Oprah NOT A GLUTTON!!

Do U have ANY IDEA what this woman went through 2 get 2 where she is 2day?!

A gluttons R fat N Oprah is a good woman U kno how much charity she do in Africa!? How about U do Africa charity to her level N U then talk about her!!!

U gotta respect Oprah cuz she also give cars 4 women, and go to the Bostralias 4 free 2. Also her list of favrite thing is gud 2.

Fat Bastardo said...

If Oprah is fat and she is then she is a glutton.

Here charity is merely for publicity and tax write offs. Oprah is a big phony.

Fat Bastardo said...

Oprah is a reluctant pig and that's the problem.