Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Airlines and Obese Passengers: Should they pay for two seats?

I Fat Bastard will allow the video to speak for itself.


Please feel free to speak freely. This is the new fat acceptance and we allow diversity of beliefs and opinions. Rumor has it the passenger in question is Reverend Big Lard Ass.


 ATT: Slowly but surely I am reposting my articles on Posterous. Google places a warning on my blog simply because some jealous fat girls whined. Posterous has a better look especially for images. I like the Google format but I don't like the censorship even though the warning has increased the BFB audience and page views. The BFB audience is about and for fatling not porn.
http://biggerfatterblog.posterous.com/

Sunday, May 29, 2011

Reverse Fatspo: "Hot" Skinny Chicks

Those little pro ana sweethearts often use pictures of fat girls to cause what they call reverse thinspo. I thought that I Fat Bastard would post up some pictures of emaciated skinny chicks and fat girls to provide some fatsporation and reverse fatspo for our million of female readers.


As you can see this little darling has probably a BMI of 21 and that is too thin. Yeah I know that technically she is probably health as a horse but a BMI over 25 is where real womanhood begins and fake womanhood leaves off.

http://thelairofwarlock.files.wordpress.com/2008/09/fat_guy_skinny_girls.jpg
The laugh is on us fat boys who never experience the joys of a sweaty fat girl as are forced to settle for toothpicks like those two!

Real womyn eat a lot and often each other when they can't find a skinny guy. Sadly there are a lot of skinny guys who like me, Fat Bastard, like fake women with a BMI between 18 and 24.


Skinny women have less curves than a Midwest highway.

Real woman indulging her her porcine pleasure. Sexy sow sucking on sweets... SUUUUU EEEEE!!!





http://www.synthstuff.com/mt/archives/2009/leanne_salt_obese.jpg
Her big tits can feed and army of piglettes! That's sexy!


In case you have forgotten what a real woman looks like here is one. Not only to real women have curves many have extra body parts.

When they get really skinny the actually grow 2 extra ribs like a man and frightening faces appear on their nipples. The quest for bones among the pro ana crowd actually causes the little bit of flesh they have to morph into bones. In fact autopsies of the HUNDREDS of MILLIONS of pro anas who die each year reveal on average 10 extra vertebrae and extra toes and fingers.



You know that they say. The bigger the cushion the better the pushin. Skinny women have butts like scarecrows.


Skinny women have no padding back there. They are lucky that us fat boys have fat stomachs to cushion the shock when they ride us reverse cowgirl style.

https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjjBd8MWs9VjzAlqKEW9zZrBexS_iceYn_MLGQTn0jjFwjSnsvWaZ9NXXRfv8j8ySHogJxOSWb5K42wzjjCevMU0NkR8i95HaQ0QckHh-QkZYurliNttE2xBEpDlbvJ8Nf84gBiTimaIsAm/s400/fatbiatch.jpg
BIG BUXOM BABE IN BLUE


Fatspo!

https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhLTkjn-_YeZOhVYjqI0193_QNdd2EX6VXapS2c_bsQWgdqv5JYGpt15wHB7GPsOFkRSheRXvB5SID2Qzj2PMrOnB2hkY96XWKqXWGH8n8vFtH1vxSHDDjGBhD8enixKEROmNt8p6vLZxo/s400/calista-flockhart+swimsuit.jpg
Not a real woman! Legs like tooth picks! Eat Calista. I'd love to..


See the source image

Reverse Fatspo





Fatspo!

https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhGCYWcoKK6KnYbzyCSffc93N9io8LrareSdvFwPsu75OHfASTLFhtkQHgAlh0LSZiYJDZtcwV4xbvfHCiLXpq5OYPMrPfUq4vZeIC-ISMzap5guWat-sVsmTQ76GnTw7hq81gfo8pWWQfK/s400/jeri-ryan-0.jpg
Jerry Ryan looking gaunt and ugly.

Reverse Fatspo 


http://janetcharltonshollywood.com/images/30619PCN_Carnie03_cut.jpg
Carni Wilson after recovering from gastric bypass surgery

Fatspo!

See the source image

Friday, May 27, 2011

If you were the executioner how would you kill Casey Anthony?

There are some real pieces of shit in the world but I think Casey Anthony takes the cake. This little slut has no accused her own father George Anthony of molesting her so that she can weasel out of getting convicted of killing her little daughter Caylee Anthony. It didn't work for Susan Smith who really was repeatedly raped by her by Republican Christian stepfather. This bitch Casey Anthony will get convicted and face execution. Florida has lethal injection but I, Fat Bastard thing that is too merciful for that evil cunt.  Nancy Grace calls her Tot Mom but I, Fat Bastard call her Twat Mom.

http://www.lesliestar.ca/wp-content/uploads/2008/08/casey-anthony-toilet.jpg
Here are some ways I, Fat Bastard would kill that murdering slut.

I would take a long fucking time.

http://www.kevinscatalog.com/images/DA1938.jpg
I think I would put her in an arena and Proud FA and I along with Belly Boy would use use low power Daisy Red Ryder BB Guns and ping her to death for days and days.

http://img.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2007/12_02/watertortureDM_468x404.jpg
I'd water board the slut until she dies from fear.

https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhiH8hssBe0oRlAs_vgTIof-8pzwcKLaJebB2_gJxXTwQtRW0nJJhvyeBItjBcg4Zdq7bDXcgQreo_KE_O5STTEndB0VykDzc-gtiLMRDCiWU3XiwLGS44pd6AzebhPtkb7TSt1-4dDIRCb/s320/bullwhip2.jpg
I'd beat her to death with a bullwhip.

http://a3.twimg.com/profile_images/112129448/GOOSE_bigger.jpg
I would put her in a large cage and sic a gaggle of angry geese and a couple of pugs on her.

http://www.hirestation.co.uk/images/140%20245%20Chipper%20Shredder.jpg
I'd slowly put her though a Tomahawk chipper shredder feet first.

http://www.dodgepowerwagonm880.com/beeldmap/Dodge%20WDX%20Dodge%20WM300%20military%20Dodge%20Power%20Wagon%204x4%20pick%20up%20trucks%20in%20the%20army%20Indonesia,%20Maluku,%20Knil,%20New%20Guinea,%20Untea/1953%20Dodge%20Power%20Wagon%20Crew%20Cab.jpg
I'd drag her behind a Dodge Power Wagon.

http://tapperass.files.wordpress.com/2010/05/pinata-party.jpg
I'd hang her like a piniata and have some Mexicans beat her.

http://www.jldr.com/ohst3.gif
I'd throw her in a room with millions of angry hornets.

http://farm1.static.flickr.com/41/79411891_872c44c7c3.jpg
I'd make her lick the Fromunda out of all of Belly Boy's fat folds.

http://www.annotatedmst.com/episodes/creepingterror/bonanza_hoss.jpg
I'd get an angry fat guy like Hoss Cartwright to pummel her.

 http://www.bartcop.com/nancy-grace-distort2.JPG
This one is almost to cruel even for Casey Anthony. I'd make her stare at Nancy Grace until she vomits herself to death!

How would you kill this heartless bitch?

Monday, May 23, 2011

Rev Big Lard Ass To Be Guest Preacher At Fat Bastard's Church of Gluttony!

Next Sunday, Beligod willing, The Most Reverend Big Lard Ass will be speaking to our congregation. Reverend BLA will have a very very very very special guest with him. The Rev will be chewing the fat about his pilgrimage to the the Heart Attack Grill (The Mecca of all true gluttons) and his holy crusade to Africa.

http://img96.imageshack.us/img96/2265/churchsigno.jpg

The Chef has graciously volunteered his cheffin services and Coach Gaines from the Meat Center donated 400 pounds of ground black Angus beef. Rotunda owner of the Hindenberg Bakery donated 400 Belly Buns. Bob Rollhandler from the Beer & Beverage Baron will provide the libation and munchies.  The Chef will have some ceremonial sticky green for medical purposes only. Members of the Bloat County Volunteer Fire Rescue Squad will be on hand with nitro glycerine tablets, insulin and defib machines.

http://www.backwater-productions.net/data_archive/images/photography/Giant%20Burger.jpg

Don't forget our Wednesday Nite Pancake Supper.
http://www.otrcat.com/z/auntjem.jpg
I Ain't Jo Mama SUCKA!

Saturday, May 21, 2011

God Lied Again and the Earth Did NOT End on May 21, 2011 as the Bible Predicted.


I like Harold Camping so I am not going to talk shit about the guy. Camping is not your average Christian dumb fuck. The guy's an engineer and his mathematical and Biblical erudition is spot on. God is simply a liar and I feel bad that Camping found that out so late in life.

There was supposed to be a massive earthquake but all there was a was an anemic volcanic eruption in Iceland. It seems that a fat man with a buried penis and less testosterone than a girl can blow his wad harder than "Almighty God."

If the Bible God is the real deal he will certainly wait until the world has reached its zenith of greedy gluttony. Right now he is having to much fun torturing the thinlings who continue to live like Spartans and work like Trojans. Food is live and true love is pleasure. Sure Bible God might be getting pissed but if this latest display of his "awesome" power is all eventually our Beligod will lay the smack down  on his candy ass.

What is going to happen is people are going to start trashing Harold Camping when all Camping was doing was merely reporting what Bible God was saying. Leave the wise old codger alone. The only mistake Camping made was trusting Bible God.

The following is from Wikipedia 

Camping has presented several numerological[19] arguments, or biblical "proofs", in favor of the May 21 end time. A civil engineer by training, Camping states he has attempted to work out mathematically-based prophecies in the Bible for decades. In an interview with the San Francisco Chronicle he explained "... I was an engineer, I was very interested in the numbers. I'd wonder, 'Why did God put this number in, or that number in?' It was not a question of unbelief, it was a question of, 'There must be a reason for it.' "[20]
Harold Camping being interviewed about his prediction in early 2011.


As early as 1970, Camping dated the Great Flood to 4990 BC.[21] Taking the prediction in Genesis 7:4 ("Seven days from now I will send rain on the earth") to be a prediction of the end of the world, and combining it with 2 Peter 3:8 ("With the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day"), Camping concludes that the end of the world will occur in 2011, 7000 years from 4990 BC.[7] Camping takes the 17th day of the second month mentioned in Genesis 7:11 to be May 21, and hence predicts the rapture to occur on this date.[7]
Another argument[22] that Camping uses in favor of the May 21 date is as follows:
  1. The number five equals "atonement", the number ten equals "completeness", and the number seventeen equals "heaven".
  2. Christ is said to have hung on the cross on April 1, 33 AD. The time between April 1, 33 AD and April 1, 2011 is 1,978 years.
  3. If 1,978 is multiplied by 365.2422 days (the number of days in a solar year, not to be confused with the lunar year), the result is 722,449.
  4. The time between April 1 and May 21 is 51 days.
  5. 51 added to 722,449 is 722,500.
  6. (5 × 10 × 17)2 or (atonement × completeness × heaven)2 also equals 722,500.
Thus, Camping concludes that 5 × 10 × 17 is telling us a "story from the time Christ made payment for our sins until we're completely saved."[20]
Camping has not been precise about the exact timing of the event, saying that "maybe" we can know the hour.[23] He has suggested that "days" in the Bible refer to daylight hours particularly.[23] Another account says the "great earthquake" which signals the start of the Rapture will "start in the Pacific Rim at around the 6 p.m. local time hour, in each time zone."[24]


http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lj02j1j1Hh1qc29z5.png
The food here sucks! I ain't coming back! I know I promised but no fucking way!

God/Jesus lied his ass off! 
 Jesus was supposed to show up during the lifetimes of his apostles.  Matthew 16:28 There be some standing here, which shall not taste of death, till they see the Son of Man coming in his kingdom.”
Maybe the food at the last supper sucked. Maybe Jesus figured that he'd return to the same shitty meal so he stayed up in Heaven with his pop Jehovah surfing BBW porn and mowing down on cheetos and packing on the pounds. Hell, I've been to a seder and the food sucked!

There is an even simpler explanation that will placate the Christians. Maybe Jesus didn't really lie. Perhaps he had intended to return and destroy the earth and kill nearly every living thing like his dear old dad did but maybe he merely got too fat. He would be bed bound or in a power chair but maybe he finally got some tasty food and he's in a better mood. The unleavened bread and bitter herbs would put anyone in a bad mood. Now that food has improved maybe Jesus has a better disposition or perhaps he is just too fat to ascend back up into heaven.


  
 http://img135.imageshack.us/img135/298/churchsignz.jpg


"Losing My Religion"


http://shelovesher.files.wordpress.com/2010/02/cupid2vf.png
Oh life is bigger
It's bigger than you
And you are not me
The lengths that I will go to
The distance in your eyes
Oh no I've said too much
I set it up

http://fc00.deviantart.net/fs50/f/2009/289/2/d/Big_Fat_Devil_by_JeetKune.jpg
That's me in the corner
That's me in the spotlight
Losing my religion
Trying to keep up with you

Oh no I've said too much
I haven't said enough
I thought that I heard you laughing
I thought that I heard you sing
I think I thought I saw you try

http://farm6.static.flickr.com/5122/5329599404_d3f880d0e6.jpg
Every whisper
Of every waking hour I'm
Choosing my confessions
Trying to keep an eye on you
Like a hurt lost and blinded fool
Oh no I've said too much
I set it up

http://www.fiterati.ca/news/wp-content/uploads/2008/06/devil-174x300.jpg
Consider this
The hint of the century
Consider this
The slip that brought me
To my knees failed
What if all these fantasies
Come flailing around
Now I've said too much
I thought that I heard you laughing
I thought that I heard you sing
I think I thought I saw you try
http://judsoncanto.files.wordpress.com/2010/10/big-fat-devil-www-avo-at.jpg
But that was just a dream
That was just a dream


http://www.drakesdevildogs.com/images/DD16PK.jpg

Thursday, May 19, 2011

Fat Acceptance Obesity Salvation and Christianity.

The fact is most fat people live in the Bible belt and most for the most part most of them are hard core Christians. Yeah yeah yeah I can hear you all now saying, "Southerners are a bunch of dumb fucks" That may be true... well it is true but sometimes even stupid people get it right once in a while. There is no denying that when it comes to sloth and gluttony the South is the clear winner but it gets better. If we ignore things slavery, segregation, lynching, gay bashing, racism and the Ku Klux Klan hardcore Southern Christianity has one major thing going for it. It's called salvation through faith or salvation by faith. This is even a better deal than buy one Whopper and get free fries and a drink. You don't even need a lot of faith or have it for more than just a few seconds and BAM you're in heaven when you die.

When it comes to being a slacker, a scoundrel and a fuck up Hitler wins the gold medal. I think the reason he hated Jews so much was because they go through this atonement  garbage and actually pay for their sins but who has time for that. If Hitler every tried to make amends to the millions of people he killed and maimed he'd be kissing ass for the next 10 centuries. Like Hitler we fatlings don't have time for that atonement crapola or some Buddhist crap although that Muslim stuff about rivers of win and the 72 virgins that get retreaded is a pretty good deal for just killing some infidels. I'd do it!

Anyhoo, in the above video the master orator himself, Adolf Hitler, explains in very clear terms how salvation through faith worked for him and how it can work for you.

For those of you who are practicing Christians and are still feeling guilty about your gluttony, allow me Fat Bastard to put your minds at ease by sharing with you the following scripture on obesity.

First of all, it is important to understand that God really likes fat. So I suppose he likes fat people, too. 
 
(He's probably overweight himself.)
All the fat is the Lord's. -- Leviticus 3:16
 
Even God's sword is fat (and bloody).
The sword of the LORD is filled with blood, it is made fat with fatness. -- Isaiah 34:6
 
God even likes fat animals. He plans to feed people to to them to make them nice and fat.
Thus saith the Lord GOD; Speak unto every feathered fowl, and to every beast of the field ... Ye shall eat the flesh of the mighty, and drink the blood of the princes of the earth ... And ye shall eat fat till ye be full, and drink blood till ye be drunken, of my sacrifice which I have sacrificed for you. -- Ezekiel 39:17-19
 
God makes the diligent fat. (Lazy people are always skinny.)
The soul of the sluggard desireth, and hath nothing: but the soul of the diligent shall be made fat. -- Proverbs 13:4
 
God makes liberals fat, too. (I guess religious liberals should be the fattest of all.)
The liberal soul shall be made fat. -- Proverbs 11:25
http://deathby1000papercuts.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/12/michael-moore-overweight-fat-spa.jpg
Fat Boy Michael Moore!
 
 
If you put your trust in God, he will make you fat.
He that putteth his trust in the LORD shall be made fat. -- Proverbs 28:25
 
Being fat is is sure sign of righteousnous in the eyes of God.
The righteous shall flourish like the palm tree ... they shall be fat and flourishing. -- Psalm 92:12-14
 
Sure there are verses in the Bible that call for the death of fat people but God was probably in a bad mood when he said the following and besides the best way to be a fat Christian is to be a cafeteria Christian.

Be not among drunkards or among gluttonous eaters of meat, Proverbs 23:20

and put a knife to your throat if you are given to gluttony. Proverbs 23-2 

Don't just take my word or Hitler's word for it.

Eph. 2:8-9, "For by grace you have been saved through faith; and that not of yourselves, it is the gift of God.Not by works, lest any man should boast."

EAT GUILT FREE AND DO WHAT HITLER DID! (accept for all the killing and war mongering)

The Belly Boy Burger Contest

I think we know know that Belly Boy made short work of those 8 Quadruple Bypass Burgers. I kinda knew he would. He raised the bar. I think it is only fitting that we let his fans create a new standard worthy of Belly Boy. Why should Belly Boy be forced to suffer with what to him are sliders.

Since the story of his pilgrimage to the HAG went public both Proud FA's and my Email and voice mail have been swamped with pictures of burgers they created in honor of this historic event.


http://www.bannedinhollywood.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/11/giantburgerap_450x3001.jpg
The Widow Maker

This one was presented by two fans and it is made with 100% pure bison burger. The mini burger on top is there to clog an collateral coronary arteries. Many fatlings grow extra arteries.

http://www.saidaonline.com/en/newsgfx/giant%20burger.jpg
Cowabunga Burger

The Cowabunga Burger it made from 100% grass fed black Angus beef.

http://www.odditycentral.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/10/burger_king.jpg
The Terminator

The Terminator is light on bread  and veggies but BIG on meat and cheese. This mega meat bad boy burger get 70% of its 23,000 calories from fat. This burger is a low carb creation is great for anyone on the Fatkins Diet. http://www.fatguyshirts.com/pics/zazzle/fatkins

http://www.cheese-burger.net/images/biggest-cheeseburger-4.jpg
The Ultra Pig Weight Burger

The Ultra Pig Weight may even make Belly Boy pass on the fries. This is not just a precision giant burger this monster contains pork BBQ and crumbled bacon mixed into the meat. Add a little Sweet Baby Ray's BBQ Sauce to this belly buster.

http://www.cornichon.org/archives/Giant%20burger.jpg
The Glutton Tamer

The Glutton Tamer is throwback to the burgers mom would make. It uses a Sunbeam bread Bun 80% lean ground beef and a full block of Craft Velveeta Cheese.

http://www.supersizedmeals.com/food/images/articles/20090222-Giant_Pizza_Burger_3.jpg
Patty for a Belly Boy Slider

Fat Admirer preparing a warm up snack for Belly Boy.

http://www.bannedinhollywood.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/11/man_eats_giant_burger1-595x347.jpg
Cheese Belly Sliders


Two hapless thinlings sampling a couple of Belly Sliders

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

A Bigger Fatter Adventure: A Video Game and Story Board by Captian Howdy


Original Video - More videos at TinyPic


[URL=http://tinypic.com/r/6izls4/7]View My Video[/URL]

http://tinypic.com/r/6izls4/7

Bigger Fatter Blog the leading fat acceptance blog has inspired yet another creative endeavor. We inspired the works of "Dr" Gerald "Teddy" Bear in his many socially responsible endeavors and fat and humans right's advocacy. We have inspired a couple of Bloke in England to write me Fat Bastard a theme song. We like to think that we helped Belly Boy and his coach and spiritual adviser Rev BLA to break the record for eating the most Quadruple Bypass Burgers but now we have inspired video game by reknowned video game creator Captain Howdy for creating a video game based on Bigger Fatter Blog.


Saturday, May 14, 2011

Belly Boy's Big Adventure.

With great excitement and joy I got to hear all about our own Belly and Rev Big Lard Ass's pilgrimage to the HAG, also known as the Heart Attack Grill. The most Reverend BLA, Belly Boy and I had discussed him making a pilgrimage to the famed Heart Attack Grill-- the Mecca for gluttons. It has finally happened. The lure of all that FREE food is what compelled the usual bed bound Belly Boy to take this glorious pilgrimage. I think when he comes back the Rev may even canonize him and from now on we will refer to him as Saint Belly Boy.

http://www.anythingon.webs.com/assets/heart%20attact%20logo.jpg

BELLY BOY reporting from Pheonix

Hey everybody! It's belly boy time!

I just landed in Phoenix, and man are my calves tired! This piggy CAN FLY! Oink oink oink!


Fat Bastard: Yes, Belly Boy I bet those calves are mooing and those dogs are barking and yes pigs can fly accept of Southwest Airline according to NAAFA

But man, traveling was quite an ordeal! Thanks to the new security requirements, I had to either go through the body scanner or get a manual scan. However, I cannot fit through the scanner machine, so I had to be manually searched, which was very erotic. He had to lift and prod each fold, searching for contraband, and he looked incredibly disgusted the entire time. They called in a rookie to do it since none of the more senior ones wanted to deal with me. It took a long time to search me completely, and I was making small talk with him.


Fat Bastard: I doubt that the TSA rookie was disgusted. I suspect that he was in awe and that the senior  TSA officials were giving him the honor of frisking the great Belly Boy. Those guys read Bigger Fatter Blog to get the skinny on fat.

http://www.medical-supplies-equipment-company.com/Image/Articles/Super-Ram-Bariatric-Wheel-3.jpg
Bariatric wheelchair AKA a fatling's rolling thrown.

I had to be pushed in a bariatric wheelchair most of the time, since I am not yet capable of walking very far, only a few dozen yards at a time. But I was able to stand up to be searched. Yeah, I hadn't washed in over a week, so I was pretty ripe when he searched me. That was part of my goal, if they're going to search me then they might as well have to do it the hard way, aka the smelly way, aka the belly boy way.

Getting on the plane, I took up more than two full seats, and they booted me and Big Lard Ass off of the plane because they said I need 3 seats and Big Lard Ass needs 2 seats. That means we couldn't sit next to each other either, which was really upsetting. I started panicking because they at first said that only I was getting booted and BLA could stay, because I can't travel alone! So I put up a huge colossal stink, yelling and whining as much as I could, before finally they relented and agreed to bump us up to first class for the next flight.

Fat Bastard: My dad had a friend named Ray. Ray was a fucking load. He had to be 600+. Ray was a successful business man and in Ray's office becasue he could not fit in a conventional office chair he had a love seat hoisted on cement block. Man did he look regal. When Ray flew they would hoist him up through the cargo doors of the plane. That was before planes had doors big enough. That had to be so fucking cool!

BLA could fit in a first class seat, but I couldn't. I need 3 full coach seats, so we got bumped yet again, with BLA getting a free coach seat, and me getting 2 free coach seats plus 1 coach seat I had to pay for. I asked for and got triple snacks, and it was pretty cool. BLA got tons of free food, and I ordered 9 beers in total before they cut me off.
http://www.937kclb.com/files/u721/fat_guy_airplane.jpg
Rev Big Lard Ass before he and Belly Boy were booted. No picture of Belly Boy available.

Then we got into Phoenix and checked into a hotel, and now BLA is out getting us some take-out while I sit and type this on his laptop. He's such a good friend to me, and I can't wait to experience the glory of the Heart Attack Grill, and it's delicious and delectable Quadruple Bypass Burgers. They are quite awesome, and I am so effing excited about this.

http://www.motifake.com/image/demotivational-poster/0903/quadruple-bypass-burger-bong-demotivational-poster-1237485653.jpg

I wish that Candy Apple was a computer company. The computers would have special food tubes in them for you to suck on while you use the computer, and then you would be able to get delicious food while you used your computer.


Fat Bastard: Belly Boy, I do know that Dr Gerald "Teddy" Bear is working on a moob top computer. I am waiting for the days when they have food replicators like on Star Trek. Imagine being able to say, Computer make me a Belly Boy Burger, Flat Liner Fries and tea early grey-- hot." and poof there it is. That would be so fucking cool!

This technology would make me, Belly Boy, a billionaire. They would call me Steve Careers. Or Bill Portcullises if I invented the "Pie on the Windowsill" operating system, which would gobble up market share like an SSBBW gobbles up the man pudding of FAs at a NAAFA convention.


 Fat Bastard: Belly Boy, you are indeed onto something.

Oink oink oink. Anyway I am excited and thrilled about my upcoming culinary adventures. Hopefully they will go well. But I do think they will go well, I am planning on staying there pretty much all day just eating, eating, eating, eating, and eating. I have several thousand dollars with me for beverage purposes, so I should be set on that front. It's going to be an epic feast, and I only wish that Teddy Bear, Fat Bastard, and Proud FA could be with me for this event. Also Rotunda Hindenburg, and some of the other female contributors to the Bigger Fatter Blog.


Fat Bastard: Belly Boy, I have Rotunda on the other line and she is slobbering drool all over the phone just thinking about it. Proud FA wants you to set a new record. Teddy maybe on sabbatical or he is off fighting the good fight. He maybe a Teddy Bear but he has some sharp teeth and claws.

If I'm lucky, maybe one of the waitresses/nurses will invite me back to her place for a little intensive care, if you know what I mean! (But I'm not counting on it. In which case, don't worry because I have planned for this by looking up some strip clubs to take BLA to as my payback for him taking me on this exciting trip.)

http://www.healthmediatoday.com/cmsimages/image/image/HeartAttackGrillWaitresses.jpg
Belly Boy's beautiful bony bimbos!



Fat Bastard: Belly Boy, I think you will get lucky. There is no doubt in my mind that the nurse/waitresses there are fat admirers... ALL of them. One whiff of your fat boy musk and all I can say is make room for them on your rented power chair and get really to have you folds lifted by two of them while the other one gives you a Boom Shakka Lakka.

BELLY BOY, OUT

http://www.gearfuse.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/08/aeroscraft-ml866-2_48.jpg
A bigger fatter airplane

Fellow fatlings and other loyal readers: When I, Fat Bastard saw the need for a bigger and fatter blog I created Bigger Fatter Blog. This report by Belly Boy who is normally our cyber net reporter illustrates the need for bigger fatter airplanes.

UPDATE! 
BELLY BOY  Reporting from the Heart Attack Grill.

Hey everybody, Belly Boy here!
http://www.wheelchairslift.net/wp-content/uploads/2009/07/wheelchair-van_11.jpg
Belly Boy's News Van aka The Belly Van

I went to the Heart Attack Grill with my best friend the Reverend Lard Ass. Yeah, I had to be wheeled in because I cannot really walk so well. BLA rented a handicap van where my wheelchair goes, and it has an awesome hydraulic lift to lift up my wheelchair. BLA is really strong to be able to push me.


So what happened was, we go in, and I shout "Hey it's me!" and then I go in for my weighing. I top out the scale immediately, and sit back down in my wheelchair, and then I order up a Quadruple Bypass Burger along with some Flatliner Fries, a margarita, and six shots of tequila.

I down the tequila first, rapid fire style, and then I nurse the margarita until the burger and fries arrive. It's about time.

What followed is a feeding frenzy, with greasy goodness all over my face and beard. I got the Quad with cheese and fried eggs, of course, and added some condiments as well. I have to say that it's even better than a Belly Boy Burger, aside from the fact that it is a lot smaller. I like the high fat content, it has plenty of juice and grease, which are very important when you're having a burger. Too little juice, and it's not messy enough to be fun. Too little grease, and it just doesn't have that classic burger flavor.

I eat the Quad in just 3 minutes, and immediately go back to get weighed. While they're cooking up the next one, I'm finishing up my Flatliner Fries and am ordering up my first soda and another margarita.

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One of Belly Boys famous quadruple flushers
Editorial comment from me, Fat Bastard: Most people can't finish the Quad.

I get another 6 shots of tequila, and down the next Quad in just 3 and a half minutes. Then I had the margarita and a couple of sodas, and order up another Quad, and have some more tequila, and now I am starting to get drunk.

Drunk eating is the most pleasurable activity possible. Forget illegal drugs, all you need is a good nicotine buzz, a good tequila buzz, and a belly full of greasy meat.

I get on to my fourth Quad, and by this point I am totally full. I order up one last Quad, after getting weighed yet again, and I head to the bathroom to get rid of some of the excess liquids. I pee for an eternity, then head to the toilet and produce an epic shit. Suddenly, I don't feel quite so full anymore.

I polish off two more Quads and then I can barely move. People were asking for my autograph, taking pictures with me, and just generally being awesome towards me. I got a picture of two of the nurses sitting on my lap!! I had a boner but nobody could tell because it's covered by my folds. That's an advantage of being fat, you don't have to be embarrassed by random boners.

I asked out two of the nurses to come to the hotel with me but both gave excuses why they couldn't. They wheeled me back to the van, and I told them I would be back tomorrow. I fell asleep quickly, having shot myself up with lots of insulin, and my body struggled to process and digest all of the delicious calories I had just ingested. I love that feeling!
 
We didn't have time to go to the strip club because I fell asleep and wasn't in the mood for anything but being lazy and smoking some cigarettes, and then we had a quick dinner at Denny's later that night. It was a rare two meal day for me, that's how big my breakfast at the Heart Attack Grill was!
 



http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v20/jinxx1/C-97/B377SGTN941NAELPJan20062.jpg
Working prototype of Belly Boy's Plane the Belly Liner


http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v20/jinxx1/C-97/B377SGTN941NAELPJan20062.jpg

I also think that when Belly Boy eats through 4 or 5 Quadruple Bypass Burgers and a few pounds of Flat Liner Fries, Dr John and the HAG will rethink his menu and super size the famed Quadruple  Bypass Burger aka the QBB and offer the BQBB or the Bariatic Quadruple Bypass that will be twice as big as the regular QBB. That's what I predict. When the see Belly Boy the will be in awe!!

http://ep.yimg.com/ca/I/yhst-2396371344735_2140_66875593
Design for a bigger fatter airplane.